Stories about anger
26 Buddhist wisdom stories about anger from Buddhist teachers, each linked to the original talk.
- A problem or an irritation?Story · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A backpacker working his way round Europe gets a job in a restaurant (in Germany or Austria) where staff eat for free. The owner over-orders sauerkraut and tells the staff their…
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There's another story about Awitz which I remember reading a good story. There was a a backpacker who was traveling through Europe said travel is now becoming allowable again. when this backpacker was traveling through Europe, he'd just get a job at restaurants and cafes and just any old uh easy work to get a few more dollars and then he would go on his next leg of his journey. And he got a job in this restaurant in somewhere in Germany. And then as he was um I think in Austria I think he said in that restaurant [snorts] it was always known if you get a job in a restaurant you get free food. That's you know part of the deal. You don't get paid very much. You get a few tips but the free food makes it just really quite worthwhile. But then one day the owner of the restaurant told all the workers he'd ordered too much sauerkraut. I don't know if you know Sauerkraut. We have a couple of German monks at Bodhinana Monastery and even though he's not a monk, we have like you know I'm talking about Amandis. Many of you been down there. You know Amandis and he loves sauerkraut. So anyway, they' ordered too much sauerkraut. And so the owner of the restaurant, this is quite a few years ago, told everybody, "If you want free food, it has to be sauerkraut. Sauerkraut for breakfast, sauerkraut for lunch, sauerkraut for dinner, whatever it is. Sauerkraut and only sauerkraut." And this young backpacker said, "You can't do that to us. That is unfair. That's not what we signed up for. I know some people like sauerkraut, but not everyone likes sauerkraut. This is not right. you can't do this to us. And he got very angry. And that apparently was when the owner, not the owner, the cook of the restaurant came up and took him aside. He said, "Look, I've been working at this restaurant for quite a few years now." Said this old man. And he said, "I want to tell you the difference between a problem and an irritation. And then this old cook, he bared his arm and you could see the tattooed numbers on his arm. He said I was in Awitz and he said every morning when I woke up I didn't know whether I would survive that day. I was very fortunate many of my relations and friends and loved ones did die. I survived living in Awitz. That is a problem. Eating sauerkraut is only an imitation.
- A sack of wet mashed potatoesAnalogy · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Simile: a rested mind isn't brittle but soft like a sack of wet mashed potatoes — hit it and it makes no sound, doesn't reverberate. Or like a padded cell: what hits it just goes…
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You become soft like a sack of wet mashed potatoes. You can hit it and it doesn't even just make any sound at all. It doesn't even reverberate because it's soft. Have a mind like what I call like a padded cell. So when something hits it, it just go squelch on the wall rather than bouncing back again. Have this mind so soft, people can call you anything and you just smile like an idiot.
- Anger's trial with no defenceAnalogy · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Simile from his own anger at a fellow monk: listing everything he didn't do, Ajahn Brahm sees he is justifying his anger like a court case where only the prosecutor may speak, no…
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And so an other way of managing anger is to have what we call a fair trial. A lot of times you get angry at somebody, it is like a trial where you only have a prosecutor and no defense. Say these, you know, say it is your boss. They've got no right to speak like that to me. And you try and justify it. That are boss speak like that, they are just really cruel, don't they know how much I've worked hard for this. You always try and get more evidence to justify why you should be angry to that person. How about having a defence attorney in that trial? In other word, oh that poor boss, he must be very tied, he had a very busy day today. Maybe he had an argument with his wife this morning, maybe he's got a migraine. See if you can deliberately when you're about to getting angry at your husband say. Try to find some mitigating factors. He must be crazy. He's mad. He must be going through the male equivalent of menopause. Whatever it is? Try and find some mitigating evidence, so you can not just judge just him one-sidedly.
- Apologising to the iPhoneStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A supporter hits his failing old iPhone, remembers he is a Buddhist, apologises to it and wishes it peace — and it starts working at once.
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one very, uhh, strong supporter was telling me That his old iPhone was not working, you know, sometimes you're mobile phones you used them so much and they get a bit passed it, but you know, he was just, you know he was trying to live a simple life so instead of replacing it, get a new one, he kept the old one. And when it wasn't working he banged it, he hit it and of course it still didn't work and then he realised: "I'm a Buddhist that's not the way you should do things" so he apologized to his iPhone "I'm sorry iPhone, I should not have hit you, I really apologize, I will never do that again, I wish you all peace and happiness" and he said it started working immediately.
- Cursed in the marketStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: With an afternoon off, a husband in Asia goes to the market for eggs for his wife, with a basket, the money and a 'mud map'. A young man comes nose to nose and abuses him — the…
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This was of the husband who had the afternoon off work and afternoon off work and his wife said, "Darling, look, this was not in Australia. This was in Asia somewhere. Hey, darling. Look, I I I haven't got enough um eggs to make the dinner this evening. Could you go to the market and just get me some eggs, please? You got a free afternoon. I Yeah, sure. No worry at all. I'll get you some eggs. But he never been to the market before. So, his wife had to give him a little mud map. Give him the basket. Here's the basket. This is where you put the eggs and here's the money. because you know you know sometimes you need to do that with husbands. [laughter] So off he went happily helping his darling wife to get some eggs from the market for for dinner that evening. And as soon as he got into this marketplace, just minding his own business, this young boy came right up to him almost nose tonose with a very aggressive manner and said, "I'd never seen you before, but you are the ugliest," is the young man saying to the nice husband, "You are the ugliest person I've ever seen in my life. You're so ugly. You make even the back end of a camel look more beautiful than you are. And I don't know what sort of after shave you've been using, but it smells like dog poo. [laughter] Now, actually, that's all of the nasty words which I know because I'm a very good monk. I'm sure you can make up more nasty words, but anyway, all those nasty words. This time in the story, I usually tell about the nastiest curse which I've ever heard. Actually, no. The second, okay, two nastiest curs curses [snorts] and all companies are from the Middle East. And I was just chatting with sort of a Muslim fellow once in an airport. You know, when you're in an airport, you got to do something so you get some really good stories for your next talk. So he told me, he said, "The worst curse in the Middle East, if you really want to upset somebody, actually the two worst curse, this is the second worst curse." And the second worst curse is to tell somebody, "May the fleas from a thousand camels infest your armpits." [laughter] The fleas, you know, fleas from a thousand camels infest your armpits. Well, it's got some style, I suppose. I personally laugh at that. Please don't do that to your wife, your husband, or please don't do that to your boss when you go to work on Monday. But the worst one was even more profound. And the worst, you know, the worst curse, I think it must have come from the Sufi tradition in the Middle East. The worst curse you can give to somebody is may you get everything you want as soon as you want it. And I thought after hearing that first curse in the second worse and that worst curse, wow, that really blew me away. May you get everything you want as soon as you want it. Is that heaven? It's not at all be because a lot of time know your life is about working hard striving to make things better. If you got everything straight away which was wonderful the meaning of your life will be gone. You can think about that when you go home. But anyway because it doesn't happen. So it's only an idea. But anyway going going back to this young boy. So really swearing, really letting this this uh husband just really just be so criticized, so badly defamed, cursed or whatever. And so the husband couldn't take it. Said, "I don't even know you. Why you picking on me?" And the husband just turned around and went straight back home. When he went home, bang the door, his wife said, "You're home early, dear. We don't want to go that stupid market ever again. Those people in the market are just so bad manned, so illtempered. I don't knowah is really angry. But of course, like many wives, you know how to deal with angry husbands. You just one of the ways to deal with anger is to speak slowly. And after a while, of course, he calms down. But anyway, when he did calm down, she asked him, "What happened to you?" And he said, "I went to that stupid market and this young man came along, he started again." And she once he finished, he said, "Oh, him." You know, he does that to everybody. That poor young boy when he was very young he fell over and hit his head and his brain damaged. The poor young boy can never go to school. Poor young man can never get a job. He can't find another person to share his life with. So we just allow him to come to the market. And he he curses me. Much worse than that sometimes. He curses everybody from time to time. He's only he's got brain damage. That's all. And as soon as he realized the reason he was being cursed, nothing wrong with the the husband, it was it was just a a sickness in the boy. And so he calmed down. And as soon as his wife saw that he calmed down, his wife said, "Um, I still need those eggs." So he turned around and went back into the market. And when he went back into the market, this young boy criticized him again, cursed him, sweared at him. But this time it didn't matter. The poor boy, he got brain damage. And so he went to buy the eggs and the lady selling the eggs. Don't worry about him. He's bad. Yeah, I know. What a shame. And he managed to get cursed for half an hour in the market. And it didn't hurt him at all. Why? Cuz he's being criticized by someone with brain damage. What's the meaning of that story? If your wife comes home from work and she starts criticizing you and cursing you, isn't I got to switch it around. [laughter] It's It's nothing to do with you. [laughter] Just assume that somebody's hit her on the head that day and she's got brain damage temporarily. Because in Buddhism, all anger is temporary brain damage.
- Don't hold back a spooked buffaloAnalogy · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: In 1970s Thai villages the water buffalo were docile family members — until spooked: head up, snorting, then running in any direction. One day a farmer passing the monastery…
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I was writing this story, a couple of days ago, you know water buffalo in thailand? They don't really have that many water buffalo left, because now they've got tractors. But in the old days, this is 40 years ago, when I first became a monk. Now, the water buffalo would be under the house of every villager. It was part of the family and they would use those water buffalo to plough the fields. And their excrement was the fertilizer they used for the fields. It was a very naturally and environmentally friendly way of farming. And those water buffalo was some of the most docile beings you could ever imagine. During the hot days of the hot season, you have seen the little kids falling asleep on the back of these water buffalo while they were grazing. So safe, except a few times a water buffalo got spooked. And I saw that a few times. When a water buffalo got frightened, they'd lift their head up, high. Instead of always being, know, looking at the grass. And they lift their head up high and they'd snored and the next thing they do is run. In any direction. Now, when they started running, they are very, very dangerous. You had to get out of the way. And sometimes people where caught by the water buffalo running, because water buffalo didn't know what they were doing and they were just panicking. And one day this farmer, was taking his water buffalo passed the monastery where we living. And the water buffalo saw something in the forest, which spooked him and was about to run away. Lifted up his head and started snorting. The farmer realized what was gone happen so he actually got hold to the little rope, which was tied loosely about the water buffalos neck to try and restrain it. A stupid thing to do. Cause the water buffalo run of. The string tied itself around the mans finger and took the finger off, with it. And we saw that, because this poor guy came into the monastery with the half of finger with blood all over his hand. And the top of the flesh of the finger would came off. And of course, we took him to the hospital to get patched up. He was fine, it is actually very easy to scratch his head after that. With a stump. You know, it just very painful, very unpleasant to look at, but he was fine. We often use that simile. What a stupid thing it is to try and hold back a water buffalo. Let it go. It is gone be stronger than you. So please let it go, otherwise it takes off your finger, metaphorically. If you just let it go, the water buffalo only goes a little way. And it calms down.
- Itch on your head, scratching your bottomAnalogy · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Ajahn Chah's one-liner on blame, applied to the newly built monastery wall a backhoe pushed over: blaming someone is like having an itch on your head and scratching your bottom.…
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he said if you blame somebody who's responsible for pushing that wall over body nana monastery who's responsible for making that big mistake who is responsible for not doing it in time who's responsible for not sending emails correctly who's responsible he said that is like having an itch on your head and you scratch your bum think about it if you've got an itch down here and you scratch your head does the itch go away of course not but you get two itches for the price of one
- 'Look out, behind you!'Analogy · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Simile from his pre-monk cinema days: in a horror film someone in the audience always shouts 'Look out, behind you!' at a monster on the screen — or a husband shouts 'Kick the…
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Sometimes I like to use the simile of watching a movie. There is a long time since I watched a movie in a movie theatre. Because monks aren't allowed to do that anymore nor allowed to go to cinema. But I remember to going to those cinemas, in the past, and siting in the theatre and watching this big screen. And I was amazed, just how people get so involved in what's going on that screen. So involved, there may be some horror movies, some monster is creping out, usually this beautiful girl an about do terrible things to her. And so often, actually beautiful boys don't get it, it's always the beautiful girls, is it still the same these days? Very sexist, but anyway. The monster, is usually a male, is creping out on the girl and there is always was somebody in the audience in the theatre, which shout out: Look out, behind you! How stupid that was, it was a movie. These weren't real people on the Screen. If you think that's stupid, now this weekend, maybe your husband is watching the football on the TV. And they say: "Kick the ball, stupid"! Look, your home, in the house. The football match may be in Subiaco over, they won't be able to hear you. But you can see, how we got involved, in just what's going on in a movie theatre. We like to get upset, we like to get emotionally connected to the movie. We get angry, we get afraid, we get emotionally tied up, we start crying. That is where we get emotionally tied to life. It's ok if you really want to get involved in some of the positive emotions in life. But please the negative emotions in life, fear and anger, see if you can look at what you are going through, just like a movie. You're sitting on the seat and the movie is out here somewhere. And that way is much easier to separate yourself, the observer of life, not to get involved and thereby you don't have to carry on with your anger. Just a movie being played at. It's just a drama, happening in your life.
- Paid to be shouted atStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: In ancient Greece a teacher charges his students a few extra coins every time he has to shout at them for doing something stupid. One student pays for years. When he graduates…
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There was this one, this was ancient Greece and there there was a teacher and he had many many students and he teach them everything. [snorts] But every time any one of those students did something stupid and the teacher would shout at the student, the teacher would charge a few extra dollars. It's reasonable. It's logical. Shouting at someone is a lot of effort. And the know it's not the teacher's fault that the student did something wrong. The student should pay the teacher an extra five bucks or something for being so stupid that the teacher had to shout at him. So this young man, he studied with his teacher for many years. Every time he made a mistake, teacher shout at him, he'd hand have to hand over another five bucks. But when he graduated and got a job in Athens somewhere, every time his boss shouted at him at work, this young man would laugh. [laughter] The boss at him again. [laughter] And they wonder know why you keep laughing at us when you get told off. Could you do that at work when somebody shouted at you? Could you laugh? Or was your partner they shouted at you, told you off and you go? [laughter] Could you do that? He said, "Why are you laughing at it?" He said, "Well, look, when I was a student, I had to be paid when people shouted at me. Now I get it for free. That's why I think it's so funny.
- Road rage left him without a carStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: In a New York road-rage story he tells, an angry driver stopped at a red light, jumped out and beat on the other car's window. The lights changed and the other car fled — but he…
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that famous example which I don't know where the last time I told here apparently was in New York I don't know what caused this road rage but this one driver was very upset the other Drive was chasing him through through the streets of New York and managed to catch him at a red light the two cars had to stop at the traffic light and the angry driver got out of his car at the stops at the traffic Junction and started beating on the window of the other car trying to get in and of course that driver inside the car was terrified if that glass had broken if the know the angry driver had got in there he'd be in big trouble but fortunately the lights changed in time so the driver inside the car sped off but what happened to the driver who was trying to break in was actually a good illustration of the law of karma why you should never get Road raage why you should never get angry because when he jumped out of his car to try and get into the his enemy's car he left the door open with the keys in the ignition and the engine running and you don't do that in New York cuz when he turned around to get in his car it always sped off some Street kid had stolen his car and there he was standing in the intersection with with no car
- Stop the train as it leaves the stationAnalogy · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Simile: a train going 110 km/h with all its weight can't stop for an obstruction — it takes half a kilometre, which is why there are crashes at level crossings. Catching lust or…
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What mindfulness does is like trying to stop a train. When a train has left the station, it's going 110 kilometers an hour down the track with so much weight behind it. If the train driver tries to stops and put on the breaks because there's an obstruction on the road or on the rails in front of it, sometimes you just can't do that. It's going too fast and the momentum is too strong. A train going that fast takes maybe half a kilometer to come to a halt which is why that sometimes there are these terrible crashes when a car crosses the railway line. The driver sees it but it's going too fast to stop. This is what happens when we try to catch our lust or whatever, our anger, when it's a bit too late. It's gone too fast, the momentum is too strong, we can't stop it straight away. Many of you know that when you're in the power of lust, you can't stop just straightaway. You just can't say no I'm going to stop now. It's like a train just trying to pull on the breaks and stop immediately, it just cannot be done. But the best time to stop the train is when it's first moving out of the station. It's maybe going at one kilometer an hour and then you can put on the break, it's easy to stop it.
- The 18-hour flight delayStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Ajahn Brahm's flight to Indonesia is delayed 18 hours; he thanks the desk and goes back to the monastery, while the passengers behind him thump the counter — which does not make…
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And just was it in January, when I was going off to Indonesia to give a series of talks I got to Perth airport and found that the Garuda flight was cancelled. It was actually delayed by about 18 hours. And I was a monk so I just went up to the counter and said, "Oh is it delayed? When is it going to leave? 18 hours. Okay, thank you very much," and I sort-of called the monastery and got a lift back to the monastery. But the people behind me they were thumping the counter - "You can't do this to us! I've got all of these arrangements and plans!" I had arrangements and plans as well - thousands of people were waiting to listen to my talks. But I couldn't do anything about it. And you know all that anger and all that thumping and all that shouting.. it didn't make the plane leave earlier. It didn't do anything good at all except making people upset. Themselves upset, and other people upset.
- The anger-eating demonStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A monster sits on the emperor's throne and grows bigger with every angry word from the guards; the returning emperor welcomes it, the court follows with kindness, and the demon…
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It's a great story of the demon who came into the emperor's palace. Demon coming into an emperor's palace, and emperor was away. Because he was away there was a monster, a big, ugly terrifying demon came and strolled right into the palace! He was so frightening, so terrifying! Everybody froze in horror at this ugly, disgusting, slimy demon, allowing the demon to go right through, into the heart of the palace and sit on the emperor's throne. As soon as he sat on the emperor's throne, that was just too much for the guards and the ministers. They came to their senses. They said, "Get out of here! Who do you think you are? This is our emperor's seat, not yours!! Get out, or else!" At those harsh words, the demon grew an inch bigger, more ugly, more smelly and the language got far worse.. That made the soldiers and ministers even more upset. They got out their swords. They got out clubs. They clenched their fists. But at every unkind word, every angry deed, even every unkind thought, the monster just grew an inch bigger, more ugly, more terrifying, more smelly, and the language from the monster got worse and worse and worse. This had been going on for quite some time before the emperor came back. At this time that demon was so huge he took up half the throne room. He was massive, and talk about ugly and frightening. I've never seen "Alien," the movie, but people said the alien is pretty terrifying. Imagine the alien, multiplied by a thousand! This was so terrifying, not even DreamWorks could manufacture such a terrifying, horrible spectacle as this ugly demon. According to the story, the smell, the stench coming off this demon's body would make maggots throw up. [laughter] It takes a lot to make a maggot sick. [laughter] And the language coming from this demon was worse! Was worse than you'd hear in Northbridge after both the Eagles and the Dockers lose. [laughter] So this was a problem, a real difficult being coming into the palace. But when the emperor came back...the reason he was emperor was he'd been to Nollamara, heard the talks and was wise. [laughter] I always change these stories every time. Embellish them this way and that way, so you can always hear a new angle. The emperor had also read "Opening the Door of Your Heart," which is available at the book shop for $25 [laughter] Ajahn: I've also learned marketing. I was at an entrepreneurship business conference this afternoon. But anyway, the emperor said, "Welcome. Oh monster, thank you so much for coming to visit me. Why have you waited such a long time to come and pay me a call?' At those few kind words, the monster grew an inch smaller, less ugly, less smelly, less offensive. All the people in the palace realized their mistake. Instead of saying, "Get out of here, you don't belong! What are you doing here? You don't belong in here!" they started to say, "Welcome." One of them said, "Actually, do you want something to drink? We've got some orange juice, freshly squozen." Squeezed...squozen? I don't know, who cares? [laughter] Ajahn: "Would you like something to eat? We've got some nice curry puffs." Are they available this evening? I don't know, I didn't see what's out there. "They got some curry puffs. We've got some sandwiches." Someone said, "Would you like a pizza? I can ring up. Monster size of course for someone like you." [laughter] Ajahn: Someone gave the monster a foot massage. Have you ever had a foot massage? Imagine a monster, with such big feet. It took about 10 of them to give each foot a massage. Someone else, "Do you want a cup of tea? We have English tea. We have peppermint. It's good for your health. Or a cup of coffee? Latte, cappuccino, or Brazilian?" I don't really know what I'm talking about with coffee. [laughter] I just drink whatever I'm given. Ajahn: So anyway, at every kind word or kind deed or kind thought the demon grew an inch smaller, less ugly, less offensive, less smelly. It wasn't such a long time even before the monster's pizza arrived he was back down to the size when he first began, when he first came in. They kept laying on the kindness until that demon got so tiny one more act of kindness and that demon vanished completely away.
- The anti-war rally on Parliament stepsStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Just before an Iraq war, Ajahn Brahm, with Dennis, accepts an invitation to speak on the steps of Western Australia's Parliament House — not to be political, only pacifist: there…
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I remember that once I did accept an invitation to go to a well I don't know if it's really a political demonstration because n Dennis was there with me that time it was just before the in invasion of Iraq the Iraq War I think it's the first one was the second one I don't know what which one it was I can't remember now so I accepted the invitation to go to the state Parliament House you know on the steps where the where the um demonstrations are and just give a little speech I wasn't trying to be um political I was just trying to be just pacifist and come on you don't need to invade a country there's other ways to solve problems and it's just going to cause huge amounts of of suffering no real suffering afterwards I thought I was Mo I should go there but I was very concerned because as soon as I started talking about you know no we shouldn't send the send the troops into Iraq and all the ORD yeah no troops in Iraq and I had to be very careful because even just one word and people get motivated with like anger and irritation and that was such a dangerous thing to actually to see that happening in giving a talk and actually arousing people's what they thought was righteous indignation justifying anger because you could see just how that could motivate people to violence seeing that was just really dangerous
- The boy who spat on the classroom floorStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A school friend teaches at a tough comprehensive in Wandsworth around the time of the Brixton riots. A boy spits on the floor in front of him and, told to clean it up, swears at…
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I recall one of my old school friends. He became a teacher, a school teacher, and he chose one of the worst schools in the whole of England. It was in Wandsworth, Wandsworth Comprehensive School, I think it was. Actually I shouldn't say it's the worst school because the teachers were very motivated. They had some tough kids in that school. That was a suburb of London next to Brixton and it was at that time they had the big Brixton riots in the south of London. So they had some very tough kids in this school. He told the story once that his class of kids came into the classroom one day and one of the kids spat on his feet, on his shoes. Actually, not on his shoes, just on the floor just in front, just after walking in. So he was quite firm, he said, 'Clean that up.' And the kid said, 'Eff off.' Now what would you do as a teacher you know, if somebody did that and swore at you. So he said, 'Go straight to the deputy principal,' who was the disciplinarian. So he sent the kid to the deputy principal. About a half an hour, an hour later, the deputy principal came into the classroom with his arm around this boy. The deputy principal had time to find out what was happening with this kid and found out the night before the father had viciously beaten his mother and she was hospitalised. The police had been around. The whole family had been separated. Here was like a young 11 or 12 year-old who probably hardly slept that night who just witnessed his father and mother, who he depends upon, the mother he loved dearly, just viciously beaten and sent to hospital. He said, 'Now you understand why he did that.'
- The cats and the building sandStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Bodhinyana is covered in gravel, so the monastery's cats treat any pile of sand as a luxury loo, burying their business in it. The day before this talk, mixing mortar, Ajahn…
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I remember the cats in our monastery. We got a couple of cats, and where they like pooing is in sand because if you come to our monastery, the Bodhinyana monastery, down in Serpentine, you know, in there there's gravel. Imagine the cat trying to sort of dig a hole in there, in gravel, to sort of, to do its business. So if it finds any sands somewhere, of course, that's marvellous, that's like a luxury loo for a cat. So it digs under the sand, and does it its stuff and buries afterwards. And the next day when I was mixing cement with that sand, (laughter) you get all the cat poo. You have to take it out. That's happened yesterday. So... but you can't blame the cat. That's just cats being cats. So, yeah, it's suffering having to take out bits of cat poo from the sand before you make mortar. But, you can blame the cat, that just adds mental arrow of suffering, getting angry at somebody.
- The drunk driver who drove home the police carStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: After the office Christmas party a Sydney man, well over the limit, risks driving home and is stopped at a roadblock. Just as he's about to blow into the breathalyser, a car…
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this one guy in Sydney some years ago some of you know this story in Sydney s The Last Story I promise I'll shut up after this it was Christmas office was having a Christmas party he decided to stay behind for the Christmas party I had a few drinks should not drive home he decided ah what's the chances of being stopped you know the odds are in my favor so he got in his car and he drove home unfortunately his lock was out he got stopped in this big roadblock in Sydney they were targeting one road everyone going along that road got stopped so he knew he was done probably lose his Kai's license and big fine because he was really over the limit so he had to Wai in turn when it's his turn in Sydney apparently then he had to get out of the car before they give him the breathalyzer tube so he got out of the car it was his turn he was about to take the breathalyzer tube you know in his mouth the sound of a car crash one of the cars had come a bit too fast and the roadblock it was a traffic obstacle and at rear ended another car and the policeman heard that and said to this man it's more important that I attend to this car accident than to check your blood alcohol your alcohol he took the breathalyzer away and said get back into your car and drive home he literally become within you know half a second of getting caught if he'd have blowed into that tube it would been way over the limit he thought how lucky could you be apparently this was a true story next morning he woke up with a big hangover because he'd been drinking he woke up because somebody was ringing his doorbell wouldn't stop so he got some pajamas on staggered to the door it was two New South Wales policemen at the door now of course whenever you see a policeman at the door people usually get a bit afraid but then you know he thought even though he a bit groggy I've done nothing wrong yeah I was drinking last night but they can't do anything because I'm not driving now so he was confident so he said what do you want and he said can we look inside your garage sir I said why why do they want to look inside my garage only my car there okay sure and he opened his garage door and that's when he almost had a heart attack because in his garage there was a police car not his car when they said get in your car and drive home he was so drunk he got in the wrong car
- The filthy ragStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: In front of the other monks, a monk angrily tells Ajahn Brahm that wiping his bowl with that filthy rag is a filthy habit. Tempted to argue — even to punch him — Ajahn Brahm…
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There's one case this monk of all people got really angry with me in front of other people in the monastery. And this monk and I was actually wiping my bowl with a rag said that's a filthy habit. You shouldn't wash your bowl with a filthy rag like that. Was that impressive? No, not really. Okay. [laughter] I don't usually get angry. But anyway, he was so angry at me and I realized I had a choice. I could get angry back, which was fair. But no, I want to try something else. And I remember just this was done with a lot of willpower. I must admit, I don't usually use willpower, but I really wanted to punch him or something. But instead, instead, I just went over to the rag bag. I changed over and got a proper cloth and started wiping my my bowl. And all the time I could see all the monks gone quiet. They want to find out what happens next. We didn't have TV in monastery. I didn't sort of see anything interesting and this was actually, you know, drama, something happening. So anyway, I went over there and I just uh changed my my bowl lid. They changed the the the rag I was using and then I looked up at him and so did everybody else and he went red in the face, bright red embarrassment and he walked away and he never got angry at me again.
- The half sheet of paperStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: At an old man's funeral his widow holds up half a sheet of paper he kept in his wallet all his life. In grade school, as two factions of boys were about to fight, the teacher…
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This was a story which I read of a funeral service, where the widow of this old man who had died, when she was giving the eulogy. They try to say a few words about the person who has died and some of the important things which happened to them in their life. And during the eulogy the widow, she held up half a sheet of paper. And she said: "My husband got this sheet of paper, when he was at grade school, before I even met him. And this peace of paper he kept in his wallet all his life and it saved him from getting angry so many times. And he told me the story of it. He said that, when he was in grade school, there was a big argument with two fractions of boys. And when it got so bad in the classroom there's about to be you know a fight. And the teacher ordered them, sit down! And get out your exercise books. In those days the discipline was strong enough, they would actually follow what the teacher said. Maybe these days, you known, been charging your luck. But anyway, they had to sit down, they were really angry, the fight would probably be delayed until after the recess, but they had to get out their exercise books. And the teacher said tear out one sheet from your books. Get out a ruler and draw a vertical line down the middle. On the top of the paper put down the name of the boy in this class you hate the most. And they all did that very easily now on the left-hand side of that line write down the reason why you're so angry at them. And they did that. Now, said the teacher, on the other side of the line, on the right-hand side, write down something you respect about that person. Things you admire about them. That was a very difficult thing for them to do. It took them a long time but they had to complete that. Now said the teacher, fold that peace of paper in half along that line. Tear it down that line very carefully. I'm now gone come around with a trash can. The left-hand sides put in the trash can. The right-hand sides, with the reasons you admire that boy, who's your biggest enemy, go and hand it to them. And the widow said: This is the peace of paper, my husband got from the boy who is his biggest enemy in that class. The one, who hated him the most. Who's so angry at him. Saying all the things he admired in my husband. And he kept that with him all his life, to stop him getting angry.
- The man who shouted at the traffic lightsStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: On a hot day on Leach Highway, Ajahn Brahm sits in the passenger seat with the window open. A foot away, the driver in the next lane, caught at the red light, rages at it: “You…
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Just that man, actually it was in Leach Highway, on a hot day, many years ago. Pulled up at this, I think it was 3 lanes going in either direction. Pulled up at the red traffic lights, and because I was at the passenger seat, my window was open. Right next to me, maybe a foot away was the driver. His window was open as well. He got caught at the red light and he was raging at the traffic lights. Saying "You stupid damn lights!" Why did you have to change now? I was late! This is not the first time you've done this, you did it last time!
- The samurai who asked about heaven and hellStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A samurai who has asked everyone whether heaven and hell exist finally demands a straight answer from an old monk. The monk says he's too stupid to understand; then calls him a…
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there's this old story and this is great Buddhist wisdom because it brings things down from Superstition down into ordinary daily life many of you heard the story before but it's a great story about the the old samurai warrior who too wanted to know what do really Buddhist think about heaven and hell is there a heaven is there a hell no really and he gone around to many many people and no one could give him a a good answer there may be the same with you may have gone to many sort of temples many talks ask many people and it's sort of satisfying you can't really get a straight answer which really satisfies you and answers the question once and for all so this sumai eventually found this old Monk and said old monk look this is my question you know I I've gone around asking so many people this I'm almost fed out to ask it again but is there a heaven is there a hell now if you know this and really know it say so but if you don't know it don't waste my time just say I don't know okay and the mark looked up on it up for this samurai warrior and said you're St to you're too stupid to understand the samurai said what you call me stupid I'm not stupid I'm a samurai warrior these Samurai Warriors have to go through an enormous amount of training and it's not just the uh martial arts it's a lot of um virtuous training and training in medic meditation said I'm not stupid I'm a samurai warrior and the mon looked up at him you a samurai don't give me that you fool you're just a country bumpkin that's all and the samurai said that's twice you've insulted me and he took hold of his sword if you insult me one more time monk I don't care who you are I'll cut off your head just with one swipe of my sword with that stupid old rusty piece of iron you couldn't even slice a a slice of bread with that and that was enough the samurai insulted three times was incense and he got out his sword and was about to Smite the monk's head off when the monk looked right into his eyes and said samurai that's hell and I keep on saying that was pushing his luck but it worked maybe if it didn't work he wouldn't be able to tell the story but that Samurai understood that anger was what hell is like at last he got an answer which wasn't anything to do with Superstition the Mark wasn't saying it says in my scriptures cuz that really offended me a lot when people say it says in the books that's not what I asked you what's in the books I asked you you now you're supposed to be a Christian you're supposed to be a Buddhist you're supposed to be a teacher I'm not saying what I can read the books myself you is there a heaven is there a hell explain I'm not asking the books I'm asking the person and the last he actually got a proper answer he could understand what hell was and he was so impressed he put aside his sword and he bow to that monk that's what you do in Asia out of respect it's not asking for favors it's an act of like thank you so much and remember Mark looked at him again and saw his eyes were watering out of respect and gratitude and the Mark said to him very softly and Samurai now this is heaven that gratitude and respect that's what heaven is like
- The senior monk who pretended to be angryStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A nun in the Thai monastery grows skin-and-bones thin, insisting fasting helps her meditation; the monks can't get through. A very kind senior monk visiting from England shouts…
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I remember once there was a nun in our monastery in Thailand. Years and years ago. She had looked like a psychological problem. She was getting anorexic. Thinner and thinner and thinner, we were just really concerned about her. And whatever we said, she said no, she was fasting because it was good for her meditation. Or she felt healthy. But to look at her, she was skin and bones. Of course we were responsible if, you know I don't have that problem obviously, but if any monk had a problem like that I'd be responsible for them, I'd have to do something to make sure they're okay. But whatever we did as monks, she just would not listen. A senior monk come over from England and we said to him, 'Look, we haven't been able to do anything. [coughs] Can you help?' So he brought the nun to her and this was a very great monk, and he was such a kind monk and he looked at her and he started shouting at her and scolding her and I thought, 'My goodness, this monk, who I really respected, is getting angry.' And I'd never seen him angry like that, ever. I thought, 'what's going on?' He was shouting and scolding her and all sorts of stuff. And then afterwards she went away. And just as soon as she went away that's when he changed his demeanour and he smiled and said, 'That told her, didn't it?' [laughter] He was acting it out. And so I was actually quite relieved. The monk hadn't gotten angry. He was actually a good actor. He actually tried to use that as a skillful means. It really was out of compassion. But it didn't work. Even if you try, you just, and this was a very good monk. He had enough mindfulness and control when he played at being angry he didn't become angry. He could do it. But still it never worked.
- The two arrowsAnalogy · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: The Buddha's simile: when you suffer, it is as if two arrows strike you — the physical arrow and the mental arrow. The physical arrow (sickness, losing your job, criticism,…
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that was a great simile of the two arrows. He said that it's like, when you're suffering, when you're in pain, when there is a difficulty in your life, There is like two arrows inside in you. The physical arrow and the mental arrow. He said that the physical arrow, you can't do much about. Disappointments happen in life, sicknesses happen, It doesn't matter just how much brown rice and veggies and exercise you do, you get sick. As for me, some of food I eat; is all types of rubbishy food. Now every morning, one thing I really like in my tea is sweetened condensed milk. Or if not that, the long-life milk. That's why I'm healthy because it's says "long-life" milk! That's the secret of living a long age you drink a lot of long-life milk. It says on the package, "long-life" milk. (Laughter) But sickness would come to me, I'm not gonna avoid it forever, you know, we all get sick from time to time. So, when you get sick, that's the physical arrow. When you lose your job, that's the physical arrow. When something happens to you, people criticise you, that's the physical arrow. He said "We're gonna accept that. That's the part of life." Each one of us will meet that from time to time. Number one. Look, it's not your fault. It doesn't matter what you do, you're gonna get sick, you're gonna lose your job, you're gonna have arguments in your relationships, some of you gonna get divorced, some of your kids are gonna just, you know, call you all sorts of terrible names. That's life. It happens. But the mental arrow is just what we add to that with our mind.
- Time your anger — try to beat your recordAnalogy · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A teacher tells someone who always gets angry: next time, put a clock in front of you and see how long you can stay angry — try to beat your record. Destigmatising the anger and…
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see how long you can be angry for see if you can beat your record and straight away what it was actually doing it was actually destigmatizing anger and straight away such a stupid thing to do put a clock out there and see how long you can be angry for it can't be angry very long
- What is two plus two?Joke · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Three candidates for preselection in a safe Australian seat are asked the same question: what is 2 + 2? The first uses a calculator: 4. The second says 4 at once. The third: '2 +…
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A preselection for a safe seat somewhere in Australia. And there were three candidates, once they interviewed everybody, the last three candidates. And so the people who are going to select who's going to stand for the election in this seat. They called in the candidates, one after the other. The first one, who came in, they said: We're gone ask each one of you the same question, a very simple question. Please tell us the answer. The question is: What is 2 + 2? And the first candidate got out his calculator. Punched in the instructions and he said 4. Very good. Don't call us, we will call you. And they called in the second candidate. Same question to keep it fair. What is 2 + 2 ? And straight away he said 4. Very good. Don't call us, we will call you. They asked the third candidate. What is 2 + 2 ? And this candidate said: 2 + 2 is whatever you tell me it is, boss. You got the job. [laughter]
- Whisper when close, shout when distantAnalogy · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A monk in Indonesia offers a simile: lovers whisper 'I love you'; when upset people shout 'you stupid old cow' — because closeness needs only a whisper, emotional distance needs…
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when people are in love they whisper to each other I love you darling they use Whispers when you're in love but when you're upset you shout you stupid old cow you idiot man why it's because when you're close to someone you only need to whisper but when you're distant from each other that's when you shout I thought what a wonderful simile that is when you're close you don't need to shout you just whisper for when you're distant I don't mean physically distant but emotionally distant from the person you live with that is when you shout and that's the way to stop the shouting close the distance between you and your partner between you and your kids between you and your enemy close that distance and you don't need to shout anymore