Stories about guilt
13 Buddhist wisdom stories about guilt from Buddhist teachers, each linked to the original talk.
- Can I please have one hour of your time?Story · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A tired father snaps when his six-year-old asks how much he earns per hour, then guiltily answers $20 and lends him $10. The boy adds $10 in coins from under the pillow and hands…
Read full story
ten dollar note and after that the little son smiled, took the ten dollar note said "thank you so much daddy", and then the son opened up the little drawer by the side of his bed and there was coins in there and he had just about enough to count out another ten dollars in coins, and together with the ten dollar note he handed it to his daddy. “Daddy here's twenty dollars, can I now have one hour of your time please
- Fifty strokes of the catStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A new postulant confesses to secretly making an afternoon sandwich and, refusing Ajahn Brahm's gentle advice, insists on a penance or he'll do it again. Fresh from reading 'The…
Read full story
is a story many years ago of one of the anagarikas one of the people in white who's trained to be a monk at Bodhinyana Monastery in Serpentine. When you become a monk you have to train for a minimum of two years beforehand, one year wearing white keeping eight precepts, the next year in brown keeping ten precepts, and afterwards after two years maybe you can ordained as a full monk. There was one young man, an Australian man who was starting his training as an anagarika, eight precepts. One of those precepts is you're not allowed to eat any solid food from noon until the dawn the following day, you can't eat in the afternoon or night time. So I was the abbot, one afternoon this new anagarika, a young man, came up to me and said, "I have something to confess, I've done a terrible crime. I know you're gonna probably throw me out of the monastery and not let me be a monk, because one afternoon I was hungry, I went into the kitchen with no one seeing me and made myself a sandwich." [laughter] And to him it was like some capital offense. And so what did I do? I told him, I said, "It doesn't matter, thank you for letting me know, now maybe eat some more food at lunchtime, you know before lunch when we have our meal, eat some more so you won't be hungry in the afternoon. If you are hungry you can have some cup of tea with some sugar, some fruit juice or some chocolate, so you don't have to eat in the afternoon. So it was a mistake, you admit it, have some strategies in place so it doesn't happen again. Okay, you can go now." This young man looked at me and said, "I'm sorry, that's not good enough." [laughter] He said, "If you don't punish me I will do it again." [laughter] "I need a penance." Because he knew himself, he spent all his life only being trained by punishment. He said, "If you let me go like that I'm sure one day I will do it again." So I had to think very quickly of a solution to that problem. As it was, I'd been reading a book, a very well-known Australian book called "Fatal Shore" by Robert Hughes, which was telling the early history of Australia. I got to that point about the convicts who were here in Australia, and the harsh punishments meted out to them. So I looked at that young man in white clothes with a bald head and I said, "If you want a punishment I will give you a traditional Australian penance... "50 strokes of the cat." This young man, his face went whiter than the clothes he was wearing. 'Cause he didn't know too much about Buddhism and he thought, "Oh, my god, Ajahn Brahm is gonna whip me, he's gonna lash me." [laughs] But then I told him what "50 strokes of the cat" means in a Buddhist monastery. We have three cats in our monastery, choose whichever one you want and stroke it 50 times, "there cat, there pussy ... three, four." Learn some compassion and kindness 'cause that's the only thing which will overcome your need for punishment and pain. It's because you don't know kindness and compassion that you think that fear is the only way to train you. I said, "We don't do fear, we do compassion and kindness."
- Good, bad — who knows? The king's fingerStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A king scratches his finger hunting; the court doctor only says 'good, bad, who knows?' When the finger worsens and must be amputated, the king jails the doctor. Later, captured…
Read full story
it was a story of the king you went hunting you know this is a good dad who knows story a golden oldie but is so powerful King when hunting and when he was hunting he scratched his finger and when he scratched his finger there was a doctor in his entourage and so he called a doctor over doctor my fingers been scratched can you please have a look at it and the doctor looked at it and just put a bandaid on it and the King said is it gonna be okay it's my finger and she would ask her doctor is it gonna be okay and the doctor said good bad who knows that's pretty wise isn't it you know it didn't impress the King that much so when he got back to the palace after enjoying himself on the hunt by that time the finger was red it was infected so the king called the doctor over again and said doctor look at my finger it's got worse and so the doctor took the band-aid off put some ointment on I put a proper bandage and I cleaned it out put a bandage on and of course the the King asked again is it gonna be okay is it okay and the doctor you said good bad who knows so the key was a bit perturbed but he's very busy so he just let the stupid doctor go away but a couple of days later I mean his finger was so bad you know that the doctor had to amputate it that's how infected it was and of course you know if that happened to you you'd sue the doctor you know you get a lawyer and take them to court or whatever and get some compensation in those days it wasn't suing you just put that doctor in prison in the bottom of the palace and he put the doctor in prison himself say you stupid doctor law what's happened to my finger all this good bad who knows business and so what do you think about that there may be in jail I know where the doctor who applied to their King being in jail good bad who knows that crazy doctor you can run there so that they've left the doctor in jail and of course in a couple of weeks later when his finger was healed he went back to his favorite pastime hunting in the forest and this time he was a bit heedless he was following some sort of animal and got separated from the rest of his entourage and got lost in the forest lost in the forest wandering around he actually got captured by this forest people these indigenous people and they were so totally startled beyond his control they didn't know he was a king they just captured him they happened to be one of their holy days so they took him to the priests to be sacrificed so their God a human sacrifice so they tied him up and the priest was doing all the mumbo-jumbo and the dancing up and down and stuff and then he got out the sacrificial knife it was about to snow slit the Kings well there's only the last moment the very last moment that the priests realized the king was missing a finger and he said stop everybody if we make a sacrifice to our God we have to sacrifice somebody perfect he's not perfect enough he's missing one finger set him free so because he lost one finger and he wasn't perfect enough to be sacrificed to a god they set him free and he realized that doctor what a wise man he was I lost a finger I thought it was bad but as he was good because if I had all my ten fingers I'd be dead by now so soon as he as soon as he found his way back to the prison he went in the bathroom as he went straight to the prison straight to the doctor's cell and opened the lock himself and said you're free I'm so sorry what I did know you were right and he told him the story and I said it was good I lost my finger otherwise I wouldn't be here today I'd be dead sacrificed but the doctor was remorseful he felt so guilty about what he did
- 'I know all about it'Joke · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A boy tells his teacher 'I know all about it' — she gives him $5 not to tell the headmistress. A friend explains: say it to anyone and they'll pay up. His mum gives him $10 not…
Read full story
It reminds me of a story. It's been a while since I told a joke, so this might mean it go over a bit. But about this boy. This boy was given some homework by his teacher. And he some research. And the following day he went up to the teacher and said, "Yep, I know everything about it, Miss Smith." And Miss Smith said, "You know everything about it?" "Yes, Miss Smith." "Here's $5. Don't tell the headmistress." Because everybody has got skeletons in the closet. And so he he didn't know what was going on, so he took the $5. And he told his friend, and this is what his friend said, "Look, everybody, if you say tell somebody, 'I know all about it,' then they're not quite sure what you're talking about. They'll give you $5 anyway." So, he went back home. He thought, "This is really good. I'm going to try this on my mom." So, he went and saw his mom and said, "Mom, I know all about it." "Oh my god, here's $10. Don't tell your dad." "Wow, this is really good." So, he went to his sister. "Hi, sister. I know all about it." "How do you know?" "Oh, there's lots of friends at school." "Here's $20, you pain in the neck, but just don't tell anybody, okay?" And when his father came home, father working, he can score big time off his father. So, he went out to his dad, said, "Dad, I know all about it." He pulled out "Here's $50, son. Don't tell your mother." And so he thought he's really onto a good little earner. So, the following morning, as he was on the way to school again, he saw the milkman. So, he went up to the milkman and said, "Milkman, I know all about it." And the milkman said, "You do? Son, I don't know if that's the sort of a joke a monk should tell anyway
- “I never expected to see you in here”Story · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Feeling awful and waiting at the local doctor's surgery, Ajahn Brahm is greeted by a friend from the temple: “I never expected to see you in here.” As if he were in a brothel or…
Read full story
Years and years and years ago, I had, I think, some sort of sickness and never found out exactly what it was about, over 20 years ago now, the last time I was really sick.. And I went to the doctors and I was sitting there in the doctor's surgery in Byford waiting for the doctor to call me in, and somebody who knew me came into the doctor's surgery and they saw me, this monk, who meditates, who lives a nice peaceful lifestyle, who doesn't get involved in the stresses of normal life, and they looked at me and they said “I never expected to see you in here!” [laughter]. And I felt really guilty - maybe I wasn't eating enough brown rice, maybe I wasn't exercising.. I'm supposed to be a monk! I'm supposed to be healthy, living a good lifestyle, and he made me feel guilty about being in a doctor's surgery. Okay, if I was in a pub or a brothel or something then and I should feel guilty [laughter], but what's wrong with being in a doctor's surgery!?
- The encyclopedia he felt guilty for sellingStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: As a poor student he sold children's encyclopedias door to door, trained to make parents feel guilty. He sold one — to a struggling young family — and felt terrible about it for…
Read full story
as a poor student I got a job setting encyclopedias door-to-door that's how desperate I was the worst thing was I actually sold one because actually a children's encyclopedia and after selling one I felt so guilty afterwards because selling the stupid worthless encyclopedia to this young family who just had a kid and they would feel guilty because you actually trained how to make parents feel so guilty but they would just know once that would ask them pedophiles or child abusers if they didn't buy this stupid book for their kid so they bought this bucket of a thing they waited bunny on this stupid book and they're struggling to survive and I felt terrible for years on that until one day is actually I told her story here and somebody came up to me and they said this is weird they said it's just too much of a coincidence but some of these coincidence because of the law of karma that's how this coincidence happens they said when I was very small this some woman said she lived in England she said this young student came to my door and sold my parents this children's encyclopedia and she said I love those books they meant so much to me and I had so much happiness reading those encyclopedias so I don't know if it was you but he could have been as soon as I heard that I thought wow actually something good
- The happiness licenceStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Some years ago a person whose life was going well came to Ajahn Brahm feeling guilty about being happy. So on Bodhinyana Monastery letterhead he typed and signed a licence: 'I,…
Read full story
in fact some years ago I was counseling another person having a very good time but they felt guilty about it, so on our monastery letterhead, you know, nice letterhead, Bodhinyana Monastery Serpentine, I typed out a letter and I signed it, and it was a license. I said this is a happiness license “I, Ajahn Brahm, Spiritual Director of the Buddhist Society of Western Australia hereby grant you permission to be happy” and I signed that for her [laughs], so they could put it on their wall
- The intern's pager and the one-or-two-second listenStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A distraught intern told Ajahn Brahm he had resuscitated a cardiac-arrest patient a few seconds too late, leaving permanent brain damage and a vegetative body. Next time, Brahm…
Read full story
his little pager beeped it's one of his patients was having a cardiac arrest he ran as fast as he could into the ward into the room next to the bedside and resuscitated him but not quick enough so there was permanent brain damage on this patient maybe 30 seconds later since earlier and he could have actually got him back to a proper life but his actions had confined this man into this terrible space an in-between world of life and death where his body could survive for many many more years but he would never be never be able to speak never be able to uh talk to people or listen to people he was like in a vegetative state but otherwise perfectly okay and he felt so guilty that his actions had confined this man into a state between life and death with no real quality of life but in that prison of his body for probably many more years and so he came and asked me of all people what should I do next time that happens I'm a monk I'm not a doctor but I know it a lot because I know how to listen and feel what I told him next time that happens it will happen again get there as soon as you can resuscitate spend one or two seconds that's all listen feel get your mind still anyone can do that for a few seconds find it difficult if I just say and it's really important just making my own peaceful stop thinking and listen feel and what you feel if you feel yeah resuscitate go for it if you feel too late leave it alone follow that and I find that that would always be very very very helpful for you
- The last animal I killed — a warm mouseStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Age 16, just after father dies: traps and kills a mouse for terrified mother. Decades later still sees it — warm, beautiful — stroked it on the way to the rubbish bin; still…
Read full story
the last animal I ever killed in my life was a mouse just after my father died. I was just 16 and my mother was staying alone and a mouse was in the house and she was terrified of mouse of mice and then I caught it in a trap and killed it and to this day I felt so bad about that. That was how many 50 46 years ago. Is that right? Yeah. No, 56 years ago. And I can still see that mouse, a mouse or not quite sure which, but it was a beautiful animal. It was still warm when I took it and took it to the uh the bin where I supposed to go. And I felt so guilty for that. I was stroking it when I was taking it to the the rubbish bin. And I shouldn't have done it. Shouldn't have killed it. And if I did kill it, I shouldn't have taken it to a rubbish bin
- The pest man who fell off the roofStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A pest exterminator keeps pitching his services; later falls from a roof cleaning gutters, hits his head and becomes mentally unstable — guilt/accident framing in the guilt talk.
Read full story
do you need any pests exterminated he was a pest exterminator you know looking for business so you know this guy you know he would say it's actually answered the door he said no no we're Buddhist we don't exterminate pests say why not and so they had this argument argument but whole discussion of about an hour on why Buddhists don't exterminate pests it's bad for his business but he was actually quite intrigued so he started coming every Friday and soon became a Buddhist it's amazing amazing the story why people become Buddhists but anyway that's why he came and he would have all these uh you know great discussions you know he was Irish migrant to Australia and he got to give it to him he had a really really good brain and he would he would not just accept things he would talk and discuss and oh he really loved discussing the deepest implications of this Buddhist philosophy and it's very taken by it unfortunately what happened one day he was just working on his roof cleaning the gutters or something he fell off and he hit his head
- The razor wheel in hell (Borobudur)Story · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Shown a Borobudur carving, Ajahn Brahm tells of a man who pushed over his mother and, out of guilt, is reborn in hell, where a razor wheel cutting another man's head passes to…
Read full story
it was an old Buddhist story of a guy who had actually pretty good guy but he did one bad act he pushed over his mother and she injured herself and of course he felt so guilty about that that when he died he got born in this hell realm and he he went down to meet this guy you in this terrible realm and he saw this fellow you know having his head cut with a razor wheel you know just cutting into his head continuously you know obviously without him dying and he's in great pain but this guy said at last you've come because when I got this wheel it was 600 years ago cuz I hurt my mother and I was told that in 600 years time another guy will come cuz he also hurt his mom and when he comes the wheel will leave my head and I'll be free of this torture and it will go into this other guy's head and here you are here's a wheel so the wheel left this other guy and the guy sort of know vanished from this torture and he went into this new guy's head and he was cutting his head in an incredible Agony but this fellow this new guy he had thoughts of kindness of compassion and he said I'm going to take this wheel not for 600 years but for 3,000 years so the next four or five guys don't have to bear this I'll take their punishment for them and that kind thought the wheel shattered and he was taken away from this hell realm and reborn in the heaven realm Just one thought of kindness and compassion did that
- The two arrowsAnalogy · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: The Buddha's simile: when you suffer, it is as if two arrows strike you — the physical arrow and the mental arrow. The physical arrow (sickness, losing your job, criticism,…
Read full story
that was a great simile of the two arrows. He said that it's like, when you're suffering, when you're in pain, when there is a difficulty in your life, There is like two arrows inside in you. The physical arrow and the mental arrow. He said that the physical arrow, you can't do much about. Disappointments happen in life, sicknesses happen, It doesn't matter just how much brown rice and veggies and exercise you do, you get sick. As for me, some of food I eat; is all types of rubbishy food. Now every morning, one thing I really like in my tea is sweetened condensed milk. Or if not that, the long-life milk. That's why I'm healthy because it's says "long-life" milk! That's the secret of living a long age you drink a lot of long-life milk. It says on the package, "long-life" milk. (Laughter) But sickness would come to me, I'm not gonna avoid it forever, you know, we all get sick from time to time. So, when you get sick, that's the physical arrow. When you lose your job, that's the physical arrow. When something happens to you, people criticise you, that's the physical arrow. He said "We're gonna accept that. That's the part of life." Each one of us will meet that from time to time. Number one. Look, it's not your fault. It doesn't matter what you do, you're gonna get sick, you're gonna lose your job, you're gonna have arguments in your relationships, some of you gonna get divorced, some of your kids are gonna just, you know, call you all sorts of terrible names. That's life. It happens. But the mental arrow is just what we add to that with our mind.
- The worst thing she'd ever doneStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A woman dying of cancer meets Ajahn Brahm most Friday evenings. Wanting her to die free of her past, he asks in confidence for the worst thing she has ever done. After weeks of…
Read full story
about this woman, not far, in Tuart Hill somewhere. Tuart Hill, Dianella... And she was dying. And I asked her that once, before she passed away: 'Is there anything you've done in your life which you're very ashamed of?' And of course it took a while to get her to confess to me. And what she said was that once in her life she'd kissed another woman's husband. And I asked 'Is that all you've done?' She said 'Yes, I was so ashamed of it, you're the first person I've told.' So that's not bad, a whole life. We can forgive you that one. But for me, hearing that, that was a small thing. But for her, it was the most terrible thing she'd ever done. But once she actually confessed it, let somebody know, she also realized it wasn't that bad