Story · Ajahn Brahm

The last animal I killed — a warm mouse

1 min read

Content note: animal death

The story — as told by Ajahn Brahm (verbatim captions)

the last animal I ever killed in my life was a mouse just after my father died. I was just 16 and my mother was staying alone and a mouse was in the house and she was terrified of mouse of mice and then I caught it in a trap and killed it and to this day I felt so bad about that. That was how many 50 46 years ago. Is that right? Yeah. No, 56 years ago. And I can still see that mouse, a mouse or not quite sure which, but it was a beautiful animal. It was still warm when I took it and took it to the uh the bin where I supposed to go. And I felt so guilty for that. I was stroking it when I was taking it to the the rubbish bin. And I shouldn't have done it. Shouldn't have killed it. And if I did kill it, I shouldn't have taken it to a rubbish bin

▶ Watch Ajahn Brahm tell it from 31:30 (to 32:36)

A reflection (in the spirit of Ajahn Brahm's talk)

At sixteen, just after his father died, Ajahn Brahm trapped a mouse for his frightened mother. He stroked its warm body on the way to the bin and has felt guilty ever since. It was a living being, beautiful and worth more than that. Now he suggests feeding mice until they're too fat for the holes. Live in harmony with small creatures.

In brief (our summary)

Age 16, just after father dies: traps and kills a mouse for terrified mother. Decades later still sees it — warm, beautiful — stroked it on the way to the rubbish bin; still guilty.

Teaching point

One kill can haunt fifty years — stroke what you cannot undo.

When this story may help

Themes

Source & credit

Told by Ajahn Brahm in How to Manage Responsibilities | Ajahn Brahm | 21 June 2024 · 2024-06-22 · ▶ watch from 31:30 to 32:36 · Buddhist Society of Western Australia

7 other tellings of this story

Caption notes: YouTube auto-captions with machine-added punctuation; words left exactly as captioned.

The narrative is Ajahn Brahm's own telling, quoted from the talk captions. The summary and reflection are Being Mindful Stories's editorial notes. Please credit the teacher and link the original talk. Markdown version

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