Being Mindful Stories

Joke · Ajahn Brahm

Mr Bear's third wish

As told by Ajahn Brahm in Gay Marriage, Why Not? | by Ajahn Brahm

3 min read

Content note: sexual orientation joke

The story — as told by Ajahn Brahm (verbatim captions)

I'm a magic duck. I will give you three wishes each if you promise me never to chase each other again. And the bear looked at the rabbit and the rabbit looked at the bear and they nodded. Okay. So they promised never to chase each other again. And so the rabbit the the duck, the magic duck said, "Okay, Mr. Bear, your first choice. What's your first wish?" And a bear being a male, an alpha male, said, "You know, there's too much competition in this forest. My first wish is all the other bears in this forest are all female, and I'm the only male. You know what guys are like, girls?" So the magic duck said, "Well, if that's what you wish, fine." Quack, said the magic duck. And at that quack, all the bears in that whole forest were all female. He was the only male. What fun. And then they asked the rabbit, "What's your first wish?" And the rabbit said, "I want a motorcycle helmet." And the magaz said, "What does a rabbit want with a, you know, a crash helmet? Then the rabbit said, "Look, I don't have to explain why you gave me a wish. Give it to me." "Okay," said Magic Duck. Quack, and a motorcycle helmet appeared on top of this rabbit. "Second wish to the bear." "Mr. Bear, what's your second wish?" And Mr. Bear said, "You've been thinking, you know, as soon as the other bears in the other regions of this country here, there's only females up here, they'll all come up here and spoil my fun. So my second wish is may all the bears in the whole country be female. And I'm the only male in the whole, not just this forest, the whole country. I'm the only male bear. So I can have lots and lots of fun. Okay, said Magic Duck. Quack. And all the bears in the whole country, all female. The only male. Imagine that you guys. And then they asked asked the rabbit, "What's your second wish?" And the rabbit said, "I want a Harley-Davidson th00and cc's to go with my crash helmet." "I can understand that," said the duck. "So quack!" And this beautiful Harley, you know, gleaming new thousand cc's with all the trimmings appeared. And so, wearing his crash helmet, the duck got on his Harley and started revving it up. Oh, it's great. You know, having a Harley, a new one. Okay, Mr. Bear, what's your third wish? And Mr. the best. And now I've been thinking I should have done this first of all. I was a bit slow and tired out by chasing this stupid rabbit. But as soon as all the male bears overseas here, there's only females here, they get on boats, you know, from Indonesia or whatever and they'll come here. So my third wish shouldn't be my first. My third wish, may all the bears in the whole world in the whole world be female. And I'm the only male bear in the whole world. So I have no competition at all. Okay, said the magic duck. Quack. And at that third quack, amazingly, all the bears in the whole world were female. He was the only male bear. And then the rabbit, your last wish. And he was on his motorbike revving up for a quick getaway. My third wish, magic duck, is that Mr. Bear is gay. Quack.

▶ Watch Ajahn Brahm tell it from 36:29 (to 40:07)

A reflection (in the spirit of Ajahn Brahm's talk)

A bear and a rabbit get three wishes from a magic duck; the bear makes himself the only male bear, then the rabbit, revving his motorbike, wishes Mr Bear were gay. Ajahn Brahm tells it in a talk celebrating marriage of every kind. What makes a marriage sacred is the relationship. Bless it and support it.

In brief (our summary)

A magic duck grants a bear and a rabbit three wishes each to stop chasing. The bear wishes all other male bears away (then all males in the world); the rabbit wishes for a crash helmet and a Harley. On his third wish, revving for a getaway, the rabbit asks that Mr Bear be gay.

Teaching point

Told as a joke that fits a talk celebrating gay marriage.

When this story may help

Themes

Source & credit

Told by Ajahn Brahm in Gay Marriage, Why Not? | by Ajahn Brahm · 2012-03-21 · ▶ watch from 36:29 to 40:07 · Buddhist Society of Western Australia

1 other telling of this story

Caption notes: YouTube auto-captions with machine-added punctuation; words left exactly as captioned. 'th00and cc' = 1000 cc.

The narrative is Ajahn Brahm's own telling, quoted from the talk captions. The summary and reflection are Being Mindful Stories's editorial notes. Please credit the teacher and link the original talk. Markdown version

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