Stories about honesty
20 Buddhist wisdom stories about honesty from Buddhist teachers, each linked to the original talk.
- Ajahn Chah's cure for sexual fantasiesStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A very good monk, a friend from Ajahn Brahm's early years, couldn't stop having sexual fantasies and asked Ajahn Chah how to stop. 'Very easy. Next time there's a public talk,…
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When one of the people we know very well - he's a very, very good monk, but he couldn't stop having sexual fantasies, he was addicted to sexual fantasies. So he went to see the great Ajahn Chah and he said: ‘What can I do to stop these things? I want to be a monk, I want to meditate, how can I stop my addiction to sexual fantasies?’ ‘Very easy. All you need to do is the next time there's a public talk, you get up and give the talk and tell them exactly what you're thinking. All your sexual fantasies in detail. People are very interested, they'll probably listen all the while through’. [laughter] But of course, that's far too embarrassing, he never did it.
- Gambling? With whom?Joke · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A Buddhist monk, a Christian priest and a rabbi meet for interfaith friendship; tea turns to cards, cards to gambling, and they're arrested. The judge asks the priest if he was…
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So I remembered this story of these um what was it? It was a a Buddhist monk, a Christian and a what was the other one? It was a rabbi. That's right. and they were trying to get some contact with each other, trying to learn from one another. So they had discussions and they had tea. They wanted something a bit more interesting. So they started playing cards together, you know, just to find some more friendship together. And then the cards turned to gambling and then that was illegal. So somebody dobbed them in, told the police and the three of them were arrested. the Buddhist monk, the Christian priest, and the Jewish rabbi. They had to appear before the the judge. And the judge said, "You're all sort of people of faith. So, no, first of all, just uh Christian priest. You were found gambling. Are you guilty?" I just ask you, make it quick and simple because you're supposed to be honest. You know what the Christian priest did so fast the judge didn't catch him? He looked up in the sky and said, "Jesus, forgive me." And said, "No." Said, "Okay, you can go." Then they asked the rabbi. The rabbi couldn't say that. So the rabbi crossed his fingers behind his back and he said, "No, I wasn't gambling." Did you ever do that when you're at school? I don't know why they say that but if you cross your fingers behind the back it means you can say whatever. So keep your fingers in front please. So anyway then they asked the monk he said and they by now the judge was getting a bit suspicious of these religious people. So you don't believe in Jesus or God monk so you can't ask forgiveness there keep your hands in front so you don't cross your fingers behind the back. So monk, were you gambling? And the monk said to the judge, with whom? [laughter] You can't gamble by yourself.
- In the loving arms of another man's wifeJoke · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Ajahn Brahm 'confesses' that he spent some of the most wonderful times of his life in the loving arms of another man's wife: they kissed, hugged, loved each other. It was his…
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Many years ago, I made a confession that some years and years ago, I had some of the most wonderful time of my life in the loving arms of another man's wife. Honestly, she was married to somebody else. We kissed. We hugged. I loved her. She loved me. Shut up, Agent Bob. You're spoiling it. That was my mom. She was married to my dad. Okay. [laughter] I spent some of the most wonderful times of my life in the loving arms of another man's wife. That's true. I never lied with my [laughter] mother. I honestly I remember when I first told that here years and years ago a couple of the people they just walked out. They thought I can't trust this guy. [laughter] They didn't hear the full story. That was my mother. She was in the loving arms of another man's wife.
- In this jail — no BSStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: On an early prison visit (Bunbury, then Fremantle while it was still open), a prisoner tells the monks they do not care who they are: in this jail there is no BS — be honest and…
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I remember the first time I went to prison I think was I no it was actually down in uh in bunby but I started going to freem manle prison when it was still open and I remember this guy came out to us and you know I was going to sit around a table and talk to him and he said look you know we don't care who you are but in this Jael no you know BS b u l s h i t I'm not I'm still not g enough to say that word but you want know what I mean that's what they said to me because this is a prison there's a sense of honesty in here straightforwardness you tell it how you feel you be honest and we'll listen to you you try and just make up or just be something you're not and just you might as well walk out of here because we won't listen and accept you and I really respected that thank you that's the sort of people I love talking with straightforward is not just going to listen and accept because I'm a monk
- Monk uncle spoils the brother's parenting lectureStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Visiting as 'monk uncle', Brahm's niece and nephews ask what Dad was like young; he starts listing his brother's childhood misdeeds. The brother walks in furious — he is trying…
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they called me? Of course, they called me monk uncle. Come here, uncle. You should've heard that one before. An uncle who's a monk becomes monk uncle. [snorts] So, anyway, and my I don't know what my brother was up to, but I was talking to my niece and nephews. They were about 10 or 11 or 12 at the time. And they said, "Oh, what was What was our dad like when he was young?" You know, cuz I was his younger brother. "Oh, you know, this is what he did." And and I told I started telling him all the bad things which my my brother did when he was young. And that's when my brother came in. He said, "You know, brother, what are you telling my kids? I'm trying to tell them to be good and you're spoiling it all by saying that what I'm telling to do, I never did when I was a young man
- No BS — Fremantle jail audienceStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Teaching in old Fremantle jail while it was still open; prisoners warn: no BS — if we disagree we will tell you. Tough and refreshing.
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old freem manle jail when it was still open and I thank those prisoners in that jail CU as soon as I walked in to give a talk and know they said no BS unfortunately I can't say the PO word now because people already complain when I use this word which I'm not supposed to say but I've said it again but this is Australia okay we're supposed to sort of teach in the local language but they said you know please no BS you know over in here if we don't agree with what you say we're going to tell you
- 'Now the drugs are wearing off'Joke · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A man coming round from an anaesthetic sees his wife at his bedside: 'My gosh, you are beautiful.' He dozes, opens his eyes again: 'Wife, you're cute.' 'Cute? A few moments ago…
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The story I read recently about the man who just woken up from his operation, just coming out of anaesthetic, and his wife was by his bedside, as you would expect. And the first thing he said when he opened his eyes and looked at his wife and said, "My gosh, you are beautiful." What a wonderful thing to hear from your husband when he just comes out of anaesthetic. And he closes his eyes, and a minute or two later, he opens his eyes second times, and said, "Wife, you're cute." "What would you mean 'cute'? You said I was really beautiful a few moments ago." He said, "Yes, but now the drugs are wearing off."
- Only keeping four precepts todayStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Back in Thailand after some years in Australia, Ajahn Brahm watches people take the five precepts with their hands raised. One man holds up four fingers. Asked why, he says he is…
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And the the other precepts story, this was when I I've been over in Australia for a while. I went to Thailand. And all these Thai people, they're taking the five precepts, you know, they put your hands up like this. And I saw this guy, and it That's what they usually do, put their hands up like this. I saw him do this. I've never seen that before. And so I asked him after, "What does What does that mean?" You know, you're putting your hand up like this. He said, "Oh, I'm I'm only keeping four precepts today." You know, 1 2 3 4. They still chant all of them. And then that made me start to look. And yeah, sure enough, I saw somebody with two fingers They didn't tell me which precepts they were breaking.
- Paying for the timber: the builder's discountStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Building Bodhinyana in the early days, Ajahn Brahm collected a lot of timber in a rush from a timber yard on Brookton Highway and realised back at the monastery that some of it…
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I'll just mention this um today when the one of the first times when I was building Bodana Monastery that uh we this was um I don't mind I mention it was Collie and Sons they had a a timber yard down Brookton Highway went there one day to get some timber to build a cooty or something and it's a lot of timber I was in a rush when I got back I said oh my goodness we we there's some stuff we hadn't paid for. So I went back on the next day and had the I said look you know we got some timber from you yesterday and just in a rush with no intention we hadn't paid for it you know can we sort of pay the difference and a fellow looked at me as if I was like from Mars or some alien planet somewhere and he said just hold on a moment and he went up to see the big the big manager and then he said okay you can pay for the extra timber But now you're on a builder's discount. And we're not builders. Well, not really professional builders, but you know that he gave us a builder's discount. And just the amount of money, you know, the monastery paid just for that bit of timber, maybe $10 or $15. We made that back 10, 20, 100 times probably by getting the builder's discount from that place. He said, because it's weird. Not many people do that. Not many people are honest and trustworthy.
- Raise them honest and questioningStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: An English Buddhist couple ask a monk how to bring up their first child without brainwashing — Buddhist, no religion, or every religion? The advice Ajahn Brahm repeats: raise the…
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That is why this is one of those stories of I This was one of my friends a long time ago over in England. A Buddhist English family, Caucasians, had their first child and they asked him, "How should we bring up our child? Should we teach him to be a Buddhist? Or should we teach him no religion? Or should we teach him every religion? We're confused. I don't want to brainwash my kid cuz I was brainwashed. And I want to How do you bring up a child to have a good ethical foundation? And a monk gave this very brilliant advice, which I've repeated to other people. Bring up your child to be one, honest, and two, questioning. And if you encourage that in your child, honesty, it means that they will never deceive themselves believing something which is ridiculous. Truth will be so important to them that even religious statements, they would check out if it doesn't make sense, doesn't matter who said it, they'd reject it. Honesty will be one of the greatest uh filters of truth for misinformation. And secondly, questioning will always be challenging, challenging, challenging until they found out once they've questioned and challenged what's left. More they're questioning and challenging, which they can honestly believe in, that will be the truth. And that would be the best way to to encourage a child's religious or spiritual development as it is yours as well. Please always question and be honest. If you don't agree with it, say so. Don't believe it just cuz I say so. Don't believe it if everyone else in the world except you says so. No, don't believe it. Be honest with yourself there. If it really is true, you feel it is true, even if it goes against your beliefs, if it feels true and is true, change your beliefs. Never bend the facts to fit your faith, bend your faith to fit the facts. That's honesty. So that way, that is how good teachers teach. They don't teach you what to believe. They teach you to be honest and also to question.
- Rajapaksa served baked beans and said 'I'm a failure'Story · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Invited to breakfast at the Sri Lankan presidential palace, Brahm is served baked beans by President Rajapaksa himself. Rubbing sleep from his eyes, the president says honestly —…
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the president of Sri Lanka at the time that was Raja Paka. So he invited me to his palace for breakfast and number one I was impressed that whoever these governments are they really know how to do their research. What do you get a monk for breakfast in Sri Lanka? Correct. You've heard the story. I don't know where he got the baked beans from. It wasn't a national dish in Sri Lanka and he served me himself with baked beans. But the one thing which I really know remember was when he came in he's you know he was just obviously just came out of bed because you know he just has to stay up late at night. He was rubbing in his eyes and as soon as he saw me it was like a moment of honesty. He knew I wasn't a politician. And he told me, he said, "Ajan Brah, I'm a failure
- 'She'll do'Story · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A now-senior monk honestly admits that as a young monk he'd sit in the temple and find himself eyeing a girl who came in — not particularly attractive, mousy hair — and think,…
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one of the monks who is a great Monk and he when he was a young monk you he was very honest and he used to come and tell us he said yeah you know it's a young mug we're not supposed to like girls you know we're supposed to be monastic but he said sometimes he was sitting in the temple and this girl would come in and he start looking at her and you know she wasn't that beautiful you know her hair was mousy flat breasted not particularly not particularly attracted but he said she'll do and now was a wonderful Insight that m c he's still a monk because he realized what was going on
- Telling the kids what their dad got up toStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Visiting his brother, Ajahn Brahm tells his young nephew and niece about all the naughty things their father did at their age; fascinated, they beg for more. Their dad walks in:…
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I did that to my brother once I was visiting him he had you know a son and a daughter they're about you know six and eight or something and I still my brother was doing something else in his house and I started talking about to my nephew and niece what my brother got up to when he was their age all the naughty things he did and they were really fascinated tell us some more about our dad because he never tells us that foreign and then he came into the room he said what are you telling my children I've been doing all these years trying to teach them not to do those things which he did himself and I knew because I was there at the time
- The budgie's gone on holidayStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Aged about four or five, Ajahn Brahm asks where the budgie is; Dad says it's gone on holiday. The child sees through it: no — he's died. Don't lie to me.
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Where's the budgy, daddy?" And daddy said, "Oh, he's gone on holiday." I said, "No, he's not. He's died, hasn't he?" I I sused out my dad pretty quickly. Don't lie to me, Dad. He's died
- The deliberate mistake on the blackboardStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: School maths teacher, caught in an error on the blackboard, claims he put it there on purpose to check the class was paying attention — 'well done' — modelling how hard it is to…
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Blackboard and we pointed out that's wrong you know he made a mistake they said exactly I put that on there on purpose to make sure you were all paying attention you know that the deliberate mistake to keep you all awake
- The only one who knew the answerJoke · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A boy tells his dad he was the only one in class who knew the right answer today. Surprised — usually it's detention — the proud father gives him $20. As the boy leaves, Dad…
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Of course it's a joke about the kid who came home from school and he told, his dad said, “How did you go at school today, Son?” and his son said, “Dad,today teacher asked a question, “and I was the only one in class who knew the right answer,” and the father was both surprised and impressed, say, “Usually you get detention, usually you get extra homework, “just how come today, you know, you did so well?” and he said, “Oh well, I just knew the right answer, Dad.” Dad said, “I'm so proud of you,” and gave him a $20 note as a reward, trying to encourage him to be smart in the future. So as the kid took the $20 and walked out of the room, the dad said, “Oh, by the way, what question did your teacher ask?” “Who broke the window in the classroom?”
- The runaway car at ByfordStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Years ago, while Ajahn Brahm and a driver queue in the Byford post office, someone asks whose car is rolling down the South Western Highway. The driver forgot the handbrake on a…
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that some years ago just uh the local post office was over in Byford. And you know, it wasn't so busy in those days, that road, the Southwest Highway. So, I remember we had to go to the post office. And so I went in there with the driver, different driver, but just the same same stupidity. I don't know why I was picked. Oh, the driver took me this morning is sitting over there, so I better not say this. But we went into the post office, and then trying to get in the queue, waiting for to do the um the business. And then they somebody came and said, "Oh, who's that Who's the owner of that car outside which is rolling down the Southwest Highway?" The driver forgot to put the brake on. And you wouldn't believe there was a gradient there. I know today it is a totally You know, you wouldn't believe it was going down a hill, but it certainly was because the car was going down the hill. And so in those days I was much fitter than these days. I was running after it. The Venerable Garrick, he was just way behind me. I had to run behind it and jump in and put the brake on. It was halfway down, and maybe went a hundred to two two hundred meters. And I wasn't the abbot then. In those days I was Ajahn Jagaro was the boss. So we never told him about that.
- When we had no hospital, people were so healthyStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: One of Ajahn Chah's chief disciples (interviewed in a BBC documentary; Brahm briefly confuses him with another monk who first went to see Chah) says honestly: when he was young…
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And I remember this other guy. He was one of Ajahn Chah's chief disciples. And he said something which really shocked me, but you know, he was very honest. And he was actually one of the people interviewed in the BBC documentary about Ajahn Chah many years ago. He said, "When I was young, we didn't have any hospital and people were so healthy. Now we have a hospital, there's so many sick people." Now that was fascinating comment because I trusted this fellow. He was very honest. And he was putting a window sort of into the past and into the the present. He's very, very old man, but very trustworthy. He was one of these guys he first went to see Ajahn Chah. No, so that's another guy. I'm getting him mixed up. But this was a very, very honest fellow, a very good man, one of the chief disciples. So I really trust, you know, what he said there because I was there in the very early days. But it was saying that sometimes development, what we think they need, that is one of the problems with with aid, with compassion.
- Who left the hammer out?Story · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Newly abbot and very strict, Ajahn Brahm finds a donated hammer rusting in the grass at Bodhinyana. He gathers the monks and scolds them fiercely about wasting donors' gifts,…
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One of my famous mistakes was, oh this is so embarrassing, but there was this one case many years ago in our monastery down at Serpentine. I was the abbot, I'd only just taken over from the previous monk Ajahn Jagaro, so and I was trying to do the best thing, and try to make sure our monks were really trained. And for those of you who don't know the way that the monastery is supported. You know, we don't have any cash as monks but people offer the things which we need, whether it's robes, whether it's glass of water, or glasses for my eyes, or whether it's the tools to build the monastery, whether it's the bricks to build that monastery, whatever. And because everything which we have as a monk is donated, even this robe I wear, was donated, don’t buy it yourself. I was taught to really respect everything which you are given. Even my robe, you know, I tore it on the aircraft a couple of weeks ago, so you don't just throw it away, just put a patch on it. Even my bag has got heaps of patches on it. Even though you get a new one, no no, patch it, because this comes from the generosity of all our supporters. We really want to make these things last as long as possible out of respect. So you can imagine what I felt when I was walking through Serpentine monastery and I saw a hammer lying in the grass, which was going rusty. Now obviously someone had left that hammer out there for quite a while, because you know, it had the orange rust on it. And I thought that's not acceptable, because someone, someone had saved some money up and brought a hammer to give it to the monks, to help build our monastery so you can come there and we can live there. So I was going to give a talk that evening and so I got all the monks together and instead of giving a talk on the subject I thought I was talk on, I talked on “looking after these things”. Now, all of the stuff which you are given monks comes from hard-working laypeople, and not everyone is rich, these ordinary people, some people are actually just on pensions and they still come and help and you must respect those people and their generosity. And you've not allowed to leave thing out in the garden to get rusty as if they're worth nothing. Yeah you never bought it but you got to respect these things. I was really tough on the monks, you know, not like I am now really laid it in. Actually the monks were all sitting dead straight. You know what it's like when you tell somebody off. Sitting dead straight and the colour was drained from their faces because I really hammering it with the hammer. And I didn't mean to say that, sorry, and when I finished the talk, you know, okay I gave them a hard time, but it wasn't that hard and I really thought that one of the monks, you know, the monk responsible put their hand up and say it was them. And no one would admit it, and that was the most disappointing thing of all. Okay leaving the hammer, that was a bad thing but not actually confessing and acknowledging and owning up, now that actually really hurt me. And actually I left that hall feeling very miserable and I thought that what type of monks am i living with? or maybe did I sort of shout at them too much that they wouldn't admit it? it was, actually only when I got out the hall, I actually understood why no monk admitted that they left the hammer there because I suddenly remembered who had actually left the hammer out there. It was me. I'd left it out there a few days ago. I meant it to come and collect it and put it away but I've totally forgot about it. Now fortunately, it was only when I scolded everybody else that I remembered who it was. And I had to go back in the hall, I said sit down again I've got something to say. It was me who left the hammer there. It’s very embarrassing but very good fun because it showed that even the monk said I make mistakes as well, I do stupid things. Now did I feel embarrassed? Really embarrassed about that? No, I thought wow this is another story I could use on a Friday night.
- 'You're not getting old, Ajahn — you're already old'Story · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Ajahn Brahm told his monks he was getting old. A very kind Swiss monk said, with touching sincerity — monks don't lie — 'No, Ajahn, you're not getting old.' Pause. 'You're…
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my monks, a very kind monks, this is one of my monks, a very wonderful monk from uh Switzerland. And you know when he knows his story that I told the monks, I'm getting old and they said, "No, Ajam, you're not getting old." And that's really touching just the way they said it with the sincerity because monks don't lie. said, "No, you're not getting old." Ah, you're already old. Which is true.