Happytitis — very contagious

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• Rubbing the monk's belly

  In brief: Around Chinese New Year, standing by the reception door of the Perth centre, Ajahn Brahm is approached by an elderly Chinese woman who…

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  I was here one day just sitting just now standing just by the the door of the reception area and it must have been I think Chinese New Year some around then and there's this woman came in you know quite elderly Chinese took one look at me a monk with a fat tummy rubbing it for luck and say what's the point of that we're not into Superstition in this place you know you don't get good luck by rubbing amongst my belly and it's offensive I could sue you for that it's assault but that's not how you learn to be and to train in Buddhism enjoy the moment so I laughed and she laughed and had a really good rub

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• The most beautiful thing in the toilet bowl

  In brief: On one retreat Ajahn Brahm's mind is so still and full of energy that everything looks beautiful. After going to the toilet he glances…

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  And that was the story of when This is really over the top, but it's beautiful. That when during one retreat, I was getting some very very deep meditation. My mind was just so still and peaceful and just so much energy that whatever you saw was just so beautiful and joyful. That's just the nature of things. You're so still, you see so much more. And I am a human being, just everybody has to do the same. I had to go to the toilet. And after going to the toilet, I just happened to glance into the bowl to see its contents. Wow. That is so beautiful. I'd never in my whole life seen such a beautiful piece of The browns, they're not just one brown. Next time you go, have a look. It's not just one brown. It's all different shades of brown. And just the way they are just arranged together like some Picasso. And the way it's just covered with this beautiful film of, you know, a little bit of mucus and water. And it shines like a diamond, you know, in the sunshine. It was sparkling. And the fragrance, my goodness. It always makes people laugh. But that's actually a true story. If you'd have been there in the cubicle next to me, you'd probably call for the guys in the white coats to take this crazy bug cuz I was really getting off on this beautiful piece of turd. And the reason why cuz my mind had opened up, and it was beautiful. You know, it was one of the hardest things I did, but I'm used to letting go. Press the button and see it fall away. I wanted to take it out, take it home with me.

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• Chicken-shit currency — Ajahn Chah's prediction

  In brief: Chah predicts future currency will be pellets of chicken shit — bosses earn the most shit, IMF becomes International Manure Fund,…

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  prediction. He used to say that in the future people will run out of paper to make bank notes and they will run out of metal to make coins. And so in the future they will use something very very common for their currency. They will use little pellets of chicken shit. And you'll go to work and the end of the work you'll be given a big bag of chicken shit depending on how hard you work. And your bosses will earn the most shit. And you would go to the bank to deposit and and see how much chicken shit you've got in the bank. And the IMF will be the International Manure Fund

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• Five fingers arguing who is most important

  In brief: Fable: five fingers argue supremacy — mirror of egos asking who matters most in the Buddhist society.

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  five fingers. Once upon a time there were five fingers and they were arguing which finger is the most important. You know that human beings like to do this, who's the most important? Who's the most important person in our Buddhist society? Is it the head monk, the head nun? Is it the committee? Who's the most important person in this Buddhist society

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