Stories about friendship
20 Buddhist wisdom stories about friendship from Buddhist teachers, each linked to the original talk.
- Annual visits with Abbot Placid of New NorciaStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A casual afternoon visit to New Norcia with a Thai guest monk grows into yearly exchanges between Bodhinyana and the Benedictine monastery. Ajahn Brahm and Abbot Placid, the only…
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that was abber Placid of the benedic monastery in new noria it took a long while for us to actually establish that trust you know actually because he was a Christian ABT a benedic a Catholic I'm a Buddhist monk and the first time we went up there to new nor was just we had a visiting monk from Thailand and were just looking for someplace to take him you know just for an afternoon let's go and see another Monastery and they were just very welcoming and from that just opening know we we started getting doing things together and we started having this meeting with each other once a year they'd come down to bodhinyana Monastery the whole gang of them and know we'd go to their Monastery just the monks so we'd actually talk to each other and we we get to know each other as actually real friends there's not that many monks you know in in Western Australia so it doesn't matter they're Catholic and you know they're of we were monks and that gave us so much in common especially there's only two abbots in Western Australia know abber B actually can't say the nuns Monastery but that was very small in those days you know myself and the Abbot of the benedic monastery and it's amazing just how much we had in common you know the sort of problems which I faced you got no one else to talk no one knows what it's like to be an Abbot because you don't know what it's like to be an Abbott you don't know what it's like to be a monk but you know this guy did cuz he was the Abit of a Mony I was of a Monas you had these great discussions and then that friendship really took off and then we could really challenge each other and that was when it was really interesting because I was a Buddhist he was a Christian coming from a very different background but we could actually ask the toughest questions of each other passionately but there was that trust there look I don't matter how what you say about me or what you tell me even if you say I'm absolutely fo I know that you know you're my friend before this conversation you'll be my friend afterwards that's a given and no one's going to take that away and nothing you say can take that away and because of that trust and friendship was there we had some marvelous discussions and actually that let me allowed me to change some of my views cuz you know I was actually conditioned to being a Buddhist and I actually when I first understood just how that conditioning how your views how your influences they you know what you actually allow yourself to listen to who you allow yourself to meet does make my thoughts that's where my thoughts come from I realize if you know I have to actually be much wider in my friendship I had to cultivate deliberately non Buddhist friends just like you you may be a Buddhist and you may be sort of just have Buddhist friends and just come here here and on a Friday night and just go just listen to the talks on the website and just have you know go out to dinner with Buddhist friend marry you're Buddhist you know and just go to Buddhist Retreats that is unhealthy have a few Christian friends as well a few Muslim a few atheist friends they're going to keep you honest they're going to ask you the tough questions they're also going to influence you and I didn't Lally did that cuz I didn't want to be a brainwashed Buddhist I didn't want to be sort of an extremist a fundamentalist who just gets Buddhist ideas put into them but nothing else so I deliberately cultivated sort of people who would challenge me you know that's one of the nicest places I went to was was prisons you when you first go into a prison in Western Australia they they told me I remember the first time I went to prison I think was I no it was actually down in uh in bunby but I started going to freem manle prison when it was still open and I remember this guy came out to us and you know I was going to sit around a table and talk to him and he said look you know we don't care who you are but in this Jael no you know BS b u l s h i t I'm not I'm still not g enough to say that word but you want know what I mean that's what they said to me because this is a prison there's a sense of honesty in here straightforwardness you tell it how you feel you be honest and we'll listen to you you try and just make up or just be something you're not and just you might as well walk out of here because we won't listen and accept you and I really respected that thank you that's the sort of people I love talking with straightforward is not just going to listen and accept because I'm a monk some sort of priest which you have to follow no matter what it's not just respecting me because I've got a robe on and a b head because I've been ordained for so many years but what are you actually saying be truthful so when I allowed myself to actually to be influenced by so many different people I thought that was much safer so I couldn't be actually stuck in one particular type of view and have that being self-justified all the time so with those sorts of people that friendship was there for the beginning with abber plaid the friendship was there so we could argue we could argue passionately and I found that's actually where I learned so much from if you're listening to me today if you listen to me a lot it's nothing to do with me it's the condition in which I've got the training which I've had
- Bernard Carr, the first Buddhist he metStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: At 16 Ajahn Brahm wins his first school maths prize, is sent to Foyles for maths books, and instead buys Buddhism paperbacks from the attic annex. He recognises himself as a…
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Bernard was a very close friend because he was the first Buddhist I ever met. And the story is this. As a young man, we're going to school and about 16 years of age, I started to come good at the at the um secondary school where I was studying and I won my first school prize at 16 for maths. So they I asked, "What do I do?" Never had a school prize before. And my teacher said, "You go off to the bookshop and get books on mathematics so you could go even further in that field." So being obedient, I went to this bookstore in Charing Cross Road in London, Foils Bookshop. And I went in there the mathematics section and I looked at all these books on mathematics and I said to myself, I'm not going to waste my first school prize on that rubbish. I want something a bit more interesting. And I noticed on the opposite side of the road in the annex, annex is always interesting. In the very top floor, the attic, that is where they had books on the weird stuff, psychic powers. All the different religions were up there as well. And so I brought a whole mass of paperbacks and the teacher, you're not supposed to get paperbacks, but it's good value for money instead of getting a hardback. But we got to present something to you. Oh, present. That's good enough. So I think the book which was presented to me I think was absolutely true was the third eye by lob sang ramper the guy I think some celebrity or some important person I said what is this book this guy's getting but that was only one of them the rest of them was all these books on Buddhism that's actually where I became a Buddhist I read them I thought wow that's what I am that's how I think that's you know my personality And it was only when I went to university that they had all these clubs and societies and I just my eyes went wide when I saw there was a Buddhist club in university and I was just so excited. What you mean there's other Buddhists? I can actually, you know, join something. This was in 1969 I think. And so I went to the counter and there's this another student is on the other end of the counter. I said I want to join. He said no this is Buddhism. You don't need to join. Just come and test it out. I said I'm already a Buddhist. I want to join. No just after a few talks if you want to. And I slammed a£1 note which was a joining 518 on the table. Join me now. And he became you know a lifelong friend. That was Bernard Bernard Khr.
- Coffee with a control freakAnalogy · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Someone invites you for coffee then dictates Gloria Jeans not Dome, latte not cappuccino, Anzac biscuit not muffin, back seats not front, politics not Buddhism, exactly 90…
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this is where I come to my little simile which I developed over a few years of the coffee shop the similar the coffee shop goes like this now those of you whove come to every Retreat you are going to hear the same story again and again and again until you understand it it when you understand it you don't need to come to a retreat anymore you become enlightened so your Penance for coming every time is to hear the same stories every time so anyway this is a coffee shop simil someone gives you a call in the afternoon and say are you free this afternoon come for a cup of coffee they say okay I'm free this afternoon and then they tell you we are going to go to Gloria Jeans not Dome not coffee beans not Starbucks we're going to go to Gloria Jeans cuz I like Gloria Jeans I know you don't like Gloria Jeans by the way that this should be sponsored by Gloria Jeans I expect a free cup of coffee the next time I go there for sponsoring Gloria Jeans coffee shops and I should get sponsorship as a monk you know because I know this is actually recorded and you do go sort of uh uh online overseas and many people actually listen to my talks how many the talks in Mar how many people actually download them is that 30 40,000 that sort number so imagine we can get sponsorship I could sort of open up my robe and underneath the robe was where's it gone Gloria Jeans we can make a lot of money for the Buddhist society that way we can finish off the Damar NS monry no worries at all aab only uses Gillette razor place the possibilities are endless but anyway so she said I want to go to Glory jeans I don't want to go to those other coffee shops cuz I don't like them and you are going to have a latte not a cappuccino cuz I know you just know like your cappuccinos but I like lates and you're going to have one too and you're not going to have one of those muffins those blueberry uh nambi pambi muffins you're going to have a Anzac bis biscuit cuz it's like anac day soon so we're going to have a biscuit and that's what you're going to wait we're not going to sit out in the front where you like sitting we're going to sit in the back we're not going to talk about your stupid Buddhism we're going to talk about politics and I like talking about politics we're going to stay there for an hour and a half because that's how much time I have not an hour not 2 hours 1 hour and a half okay now if someone invited you for a cup of coffee and they told you where you going to go what coffee you going to drink what are you going to eat what are you going to talk about where you going to sit and for how long would you want to go with them of course not you make up some excuse I just remembered oh I'm terribly sorry I've got to go to the dentist this afternoon it slipped my mind I'm terribly sorry anything to get out of going with such a control freak
- Coralie wrestled him into a funeral hugStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: At Clem Kentish's funeral his daughter Coralie (farm girl who wrestled sheep) insisted on hugging the monk despite the rule; he said no — she said yes — and he had no chance.
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His daughter Corali you know she knew how much he loved our monks and the good friendship we had. So, you know what happens in Australia after a funeral sort of, you know, she came I came up to give my best wishes and she said, "Uh, uh, can I give you a hug? You're not supposed to hug monks if you're girls." And I said, "No, you can't do that." She said, "Yes, I can." [laughter] Now, don't any of you try that because she would wrestle sheep. She was a farm farm girl. I didn't have a chance
- Dr Yi Fa the 'Hinayana'Story · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: In Bangkok Ajahn Brahm banters with Mahayana nun Dr Yi Fa (Fo Guang Shan, San Diego): when will she train disciples? He has monks at the monastery — so she is the selfish…
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when I was in Bangkok I saw Dr Yi Fa who was at our Global Conference last year and we always argue, well, not argue, but we have this banter between us, She's from the Taiwanese Fo Guang Shan group and she's based in San Diego she's a Mahayana nun, and I'm a Theravada monk. And I said, "When are you going to have some disciples?" Because she goes around from place to place but she never trains any other nuns. I said, look at me, I train all these disciples I've got all these monks with me at the monastery I say, you are a Hinayana, your're selfish Dr Yi Fa. I'm the Mahayana
- He only meant to give her liftsStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: After divorce a man rehoming his pedigree dog met an elderly woman who needed rides to doctor and dentist; he happily took time off work for years. One day she asked him into her…
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he had used to have this pedigree dog. And being divorced and just staying in a small apartment somewhere that uh he couldn't look after the dog. So, he saw if he could find other owners of a similar breed so he can give the dog to somebody else to be looked after. And that actually got him in contact with the this old lady. And the old lady didn't want the dog, but she said, "Well, if you don't mind uh I don't have any transport and I do have some business every now and again go to see the doctor or going to see the dentist in town and it's just too difficult for me to get the bus." And he said because he was a kind person, he said, "Oh, well, I'll I'll give you a lift whenever you want." He was owning his own business, running his own little show, not making very much, but you know, he's getting by. And he said that one day after maybe a year or two of him giving her a lift, he said, "I always loved serving." He always loved whenever she called and said, "Is it too much trouble?" He said, "No, no, I'm very happy to take time away from the office and take you to where you need to go." You just Have you ever noticed when you are kind, when you just say what you're not for me or for somebody else, you get so much good energy? I always do that because it's not some some of the stuff which I do, I shouldn't really be doing it, but it's a wonderful thing to be able to help someone else and do something else and do something which is sometimes really silly stupid. I mean stupid, but kind. And before I go back to this gentleman and what happened with this old lady, that I remember just sitting here on a Friday night many years ago. And that um just before the uh the talk, I got a call from Singapore that the husband of one of our um supporters had really helped us so many times. Even just when we got John Cowell for our retreat center, we just didn't have enough money to pay the bills. And when I went to over to Thailand, she said, "How much?" And I said, "Here's a check." She did it. And a a little Well, maybe a little thing or big thing like that, I always remember that. People really helped me, got me out of difficult situations. I will never forget you. Her husband died. And they called up I think in the morning of Friday. And said, "Can you come, please, tomorrow for the funeral on Saturday?" I said, "That's impossible. I've got to give a talk on a Friday night. I've got so many things to do. It's a really stupid thing to try and probably won't be able to get a flight." So, I rang up Singapore Airlines and got a flight. Leaving right after the Friday night talk. That's so stupid. I just arrived in Singapore on Saturday morning, sort of really tired, half asleep, but did the funeral for her. I do love doing things like that. It's absolutely ridiculous. I should look after my health, but actually my health was great. Why is that? Even you don't have any sleep, you know, and you've still got full energy. It is because you're getting into a source of energy and power, which is from kindness, from love, from giving, from just doing something for the sake of someone needs you. And so, back to this gentleman who used to come to our Buddhist Society many years ago. This old lady called him and said, "Look, I'm sorry to disturb you again, but I've got to go and see my lawyer and it's just really hard getting sort of the buses and stuff and where my lawyer lives and I'm very old, it's very hard to walk." So, he had no worries. I'm delighted to take an hour off work and then just come and look after you. It's I enjoy it. And so, he took her to the lawyer and he usually parked his car outside. So, he said, "No, I really need you to come in." And I thought to sign some some documents and I'll be a witness or something. And then found the reason why she wanted to have him in the lawyer's office. And he told me this here many years ago. He said it was because she was making him the sole beneficiary of her of her of her will
- How the ice-cream cone was inventedStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: At the 1908 (he hedges the year) St Louis World's Fair, an ice-cream stall sat next to a waffle stall. After a couple of weeks the vendors became friends, combined their…
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but I told them a little story which from a long time ago I in the 1908 or somewhere around then World's Fair was held in St Louis United States and like any World's Fair there were selling all types of food and it just happened by fortuitous chance that the ice cream store was situated right next door to the store selling waffles and you might think what has waffles to do with ice cream or what has ice cream to do with waffles but because they were next to each other for a couple of weeks they talked to each other they became friends and they be decided to try and combine their products and that is where we got the ice cream cone from the St Louis World's Fair the fortuitous coming together of waffles and ice cream so who knows the coming together of Buddhism and computers who knows where that might lead and that is why it is great to actually to think outside the box look outside the box
- I knew you'd wake me for alms roundStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: An old Scout friend visiting him in NE Thailand skipped the 3 a.m. wake-up but trusted Ajahn Brahm 100% to knock at 5:30 for village alms round — a reliability he said was rare…
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one of my old school friends you know we were in Boy Scout Cubs together and just I still remain friends over all these years he's not a Buddhist but he came to visit me in Thailand many years ago and part of in those days you know 30 something years ago over in the northeast of thaila one of the most beautiful experiences was the morning arms round we'd get up just you know we get up at 3:00 in the morning in that place and meditate and chant when the sun came up we'd go on arms around well we took our Bowl we walked to the local Village for our our rice our food for the day and that Village they expected us and they were part of their their day a few times when we never went they really missed us it was just like the Milkman coming or or whatever but anyway we'd always go there every morning and it was the first know time of the day it was really cool and beautiful people were waking up you can see the smoke from the little woodf fires coming up from the Village it was a beautiful Serene event to come with the monks as they walk silently through the village for arms round so I invited my friend know why don't come with me tomorrow morning we go on arms round in the village and he said look I don't get up that early how many people except monks get up you know at 3:00 in the morning or 4:00 in the morning what time do you get up I bet it's not that time actually most people don't go to bed till 3:00 4:00 in the morning when the MKS get up but anyway so I said look you don't have to worry I will wake you up tomorrow morning just before arms maybe about 5:30 or 6:00 you just sleep in your room and I'll be there tomorrow morning so that's what I did the following morning I woke him up you know 5 minutes early you can just put on something you don't have to get dressed to go for arms R in Northeast Thailand the villagers wear Rags so you can wear Rags too well not Rags but you know the sort of stuff which people used to wear those days so we went on arms around and on the way back he was just you know talking cuz he was an old friend we're talking how wonderful it was to have this experience of you know being on this ancient 2500 Year tradition of the monks going in the early morning on arms round and coming back again but he said the most amazing experience was when he went to bed that night cuz he said I knew that you would be there in the morning to wake me up I knew 100% And he said that's something which is very uncommon for me living in London he said many of people they promised me things and they say they will be there and they make all of these these plans that yes at that time I will do that for you and he said so often they let me down they're unreliable but for you you're a monk you're a good old friend I knew you'd be there
- I put my hand on his knee — we could always solve our differencesStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: As a young monk, Ajahn Brahm meets former Thai PM Dr Sanya Dharmasakti (later the King's chief adviser). The PM says he never met a problem with political enemies he couldn't…
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we had a former Prime Minister of Thailand who came to visit at Incheon I had to speak with him for sure well those of you ties us that dr. Sonya Thomas Hauk he later became the King's chief adviser he was a prime minister for about one year in Thailand and he told me that he'd been in a support position he said there was never ever a problem I couldn't solve with my enemies with other politicians never was there a problem I couldn't solve and I just went to see them just the two of us he said I put my hand on his knee which in Thailand didn't mean you were gay it meant you were friends I put my hand on his knee as an act of friendship and because I'm a friendship the first part of our conversation we could always solve our differences and he meant that he was sincere and when a person is such an important and position weather is offered so much conflict is a prime minister a leader of a nation involved in other politicking and vested interest when he could say things like that I thought well why can I say things like that when I'm not a prime minister
- Mortal enemies who go out to dinnerStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Jerry Hansen, who built the retreat centre, told Ajahn Brahm he would fight publicly with union representative Kevin Reynolds for the media, then go out to dinner in the evening…
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I remember know this I don't mind saying he told me this you know the fellow who built our Retreat Center Jerry Hansen you know he had his fights with Kevin Reynolds you know with the the union sort of Representative but he told me Percy said I yeah and we have these fights you know for the media but then we go out for dinner in the evening quite quite admired that you know the sort of you know what the what the newspaper say is mortal enemies but you know then they sort of they have dinner again they s establish a friendship
- Okay darling — I'll help you packStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A Perth mother whose six-year-old wanted to leave home packed his teddy and PlayStation, made a sandwich, kissed him at the door; ~50 metres later he came home homesick to…
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Mommy I don't love you any longer I want to leave home a six yearold wanted to leave home you know what mommy did Mommy said good idea darling I'll help you pack your bags this last week's did I told a story okay cuz I I give so many talks I'm getting old now so my memor sometimes go wouldn't I tell this last story I think it was at the retreat so okay darling you can leave home and Mommy went to pack the suitcase for her little kid six-year-old so went to the bedroom got the little kids suitcase and packed all the important things in life like the teddy bear like the PlayStation and other things in little bag and mommy said oh darling before you leave I'll make you something for lunch so the mommy made a sandwich for a kid and the kid carrying the the the sandwich in one hand and her a bag uh suitcase in the left hand in the other hand just a mommy kissed her her son six-year-old at the front door and the kid walked to the end of the Garden Path opened the door and just went off into their life he let the six-year-old leave home and of course you know what the six-year-old did it just got about maybe 50 m past the garden gate when he got homesick turned around came through the garden gate up the Garden Path and mommy was still waiting there welcome home darling
- Ordain the nuns and we'll kick you outStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: After bhikkhunī ordination, old Thai-forest friends threaten expulsion; say the nuns aren't real and all is forgiven — he faces the choice between easy belonging and the nuns.
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ordination of bikinis of nuns and facing all of my friends who said we're going to kick you out of our group we're going to expel you and these were my friends I've grown up with this is my heritage but you can say if you say that that bikini ordination was wrong and those ladies which you now go and visit at Santi Monastery ironya over in damasara or Venable New Order sorry Venable IO I am over in patachara if you say that those aren't real nuns then All Is Forgiven
- Pub arguments, then buy each other a drinkStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: At university (and before), Ajahn Brahm and friends spent evenings in pubs arguing passionately about philosophy, religion, politics and sport — going at it excitedly, with…
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I remember many many evenings espe well you know before I even went to college but especially when I was at University many evenings going to a pub or a bar with your friends I we'd have great arguments arguments about everything you know philosophy you know religion politics sport we would argue and the arguments were passionate and they have to be passionate please put passion into your life especially compassion that's the best passion of all but don't just do things half-hearted so we' really go at it and we' be excited emotional that was important that gave it power
- Singapore Airlines after the Friday talkStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A supporter who had bailed out Jhana Grove finances lost her husband; they asked him to do the Saturday funeral in Singapore. After the Friday talk he flew overnight, arrived…
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I got a call from Singapore that the husband of one of our um supporters had really helped us so many times. Even just when we got John Cowell for our retreat center, we just didn't have enough money to pay the bills. And when I went to over to Thailand, she said, "How much?" And I said, "Here's a check." She did it. And a a little Well, maybe a little thing or big thing like that, I always remember that. People really helped me, got me out of difficult situations. I will never forget you. Her husband died. And they called up I think in the morning of Friday. And said, "Can you come, please, tomorrow for the funeral on Saturday?" I said, "That's impossible. I've got to give a talk on a Friday night. I've got so many things to do. It's a really stupid thing to try and probably won't be able to get a flight." So, I rang up Singapore Airlines and got a flight. Leaving right after the Friday night talk. That's so stupid. I just arrived in Singapore on Saturday morning, sort of really tired, half asleep, but did the funeral for her
- The ghost who kept playing practical jokesStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A Scottish man's mate promises that after death he will still play practical jokes; in the English friend's house a pot plant and other tricks convince the visitor the ghost is…
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I'm going to still play practical jokes on you and he did and so this house had this ghost we always playing practical jokes even to the point this guy went to work one day the guy who survived the F who survived and all this furniture from the front room was in the garden when he came back to work and it's all it's him again and so this guy the um the Scottish guy who was visiting they're talking about this and he said I don't believe in ghosts said really I see if I can get him to do something for you and they're just having coffee on the coffee table and there was a pot plant
- The heretics' pewStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Ajahn Brahm, Abbot Placid of New Norcia, and a Uniting Church moderator sit together at St George's Cathedral for the ordination of Bishop Kay Goldsworthy (as captioned Kate…
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to explain why or what what our friendship that we were invited wants to see George's Cathedral in Perth for the ordination of Bishop Kate Bosworth in the first Anglican bishop in the world and so that we had an invitation there and this is a three of us the Uniting Church minister or the moderator a blasted at me and I know I think was our Williams mr. Pennell Williams or something he was see his rod mutton here because yeah it was what's his first name Williams or something they had really long white hair no no no it was I think a waiter one but anyway he was also a really good friend so the three of us were in the pew and we called it the heretics pew because everybody else was an Anglican and you know if you ever go to an ordination ceremony have an automation 74 the bhikkhunis that's actually only was in 17th no I don't know the 20th or something anyway we're actually ordaining two more bikinis that dumbass ARRA soon anyway that's coming have a look at the website now ordination of 40 ordained Buddhist nuns that's really good fun that breaks in between and running commentaries but for the ordination please excuse me if anyone's distances from the Anglican Church it takes two hours of ceremonies and Stafford and singing hymns and goodness knows what else which I can't understand but so we spent the three of us telling jokes I said we were just like naughty children at school but because we were leaders of our respective churches no one could actually punish us but we really deserve to be sent out or sent him to the corner and just naughty naughty happens but we had there were human beings and we really enjoyed what mother's company
- The tired schoolteacher on alms roundStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: An old friend who became a schoolteacher visits Ajahn Brahm in northeast Thailand. Exhausted and stressed, he resists the dawn alms round; Brahm insists. Walking back afterwards…
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he came to visit me in thailand many many years ago and he was he became like a school teacher and i was a monk and he came to visit me in thailand and when he arrived there it's amazing to actually define me all that way and so i settled him into his room and i said one of the wonderful things to experience in those days in northeast thailand was the arms round in the morning could we get up really early at dawn and just as the they get slight the monks take their ball and they walk silently mindfully through the village and it's really poor people they get up early to put some rice in the monk's bowl and if you don't go there they sort of come and ask you where have you been we want you to come here seeing peaceful calm people first thing in the morning it starts our day and we'd really miss it if you never came so it was just a sight of peaceful people calm quiet people just walking through the village reminding them of their spirituality and they'd come in there and quietly they put a bit of rice in the poll and then we come back to the to the monastery afterwards for our meal and you know that i said this is one of the best times of the morning it's cool the light is perfect you know you must come and he said listen i'm just i'm so tired i get so stressed at work there's no way i can wake up at that time of the morning and i said you don't have to worry at all i'll come to your room and i'll knock on the door 15 minutes before we go so you can get time to get ready okay that was the agreement and i obviously did that and as we were walking back he thanked me because there was a wonderful time of the day and it was really spiritual peaceful kind people looking after one another and he on the way back he told me thank you for
- The worm in the pile of dungStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A good monk reborn in heaven searches every realm for his misbehaving friend and finds him reborn as a worm in dung; he offers to take him to heaven, but the worm, hearing there…
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Once there were two monks, two Buddhist monks. And I say this because I'm a monk myself, not all monks behave well. There are many scallywag monks. Unfortunately, those are the ones people like to read about in the newspapers. The good monks very rarely get in the newspapers. It's not newsworthy to say "Ajahn Brahm meditated for the last three months." But if Ajahn Brahm did something stupid like went to the casino or whatever, then of course -- or got drunk because somebody gave us a cake steeped in alcohol -- then you might sort of put it in the newspaper. But... one of the monks, of these two monks misbehaved. The other one was a good monk. So when they died one of the monks got reborn in a beautiful heaven realm, while the other naughty monk got reborn as a worm in a pile of shit. And as monks, we have a lot of friendship and community and fellowship. Like even here we try and look after each other. And so after a few, who knows, days up in heaven this ex-monk who was born as a heavenly being started to think "Where is my friend? My old mate? I haven't seen him for a couple of days." So when you get reborn in a heaven realm, according to Buddhism, you have all these powers and so he used some of his powers to search his heaven realm for his friend. He couldn't find him anywhere there. So he went up a couple levels of heaven trying to find him there. He wasn't there either. Lower heavenly realms, couldn't find him there. He said, ah -- according to Buddhism the rebirth as a human being is one of the best rebirths because it's not too much happiness, not too much suffering, a great place to become enlightened -- he said "Ah, my friend, he's been reborn as a human being again. I bet that's what's happened, why I can't find him in heaven." So he searched around the human realm. No trace there either. "My goodness," he thought, "he didn't do some really bad karma and got reborn as a dog or a cat...?" So he looked in the realm of the dogs and the cats. I know some people here think being reborn as a dog is a wonderful rebirth because you don't have to go to work on a Monday morning, but that's not the case. If you think that being reborn as a dog is a good idea, please remember what they do to a dog after one or two weeks when it's born. They take it to the vet and you know what they do to it there. So if you want that... [laughs] Anyway, he couldn't find his friend as a dog or a cat, so he looked at all the other animals. Still couldn't find his friend. He wouldn't give up. He started looking in the lower realms of the creepy crawlies, and there, to his shock and surprise, he saw his best friend was born as a worm in a pile of shit. Now, what would you do if that was your friend? You go and help them out. So he went up to that pile of stinky poo and actually called out and said "Hey worm, worm! Do you remember me? We were monks in a past life. We were the best of friends. Now, you've made some bad karma, but don't worry I can get you out of this. Come with me up to heaven." And the worm in the pile of dung said "First of all I'd like to ask some questions. Number one, is there any shit up in heaven? Of course there's no shit in heaven! It's pure and fragrant and lovely stuff there. He said "If there's no shit I'm not going." "Why not?" He said, "Well look, it's fragrant. It smells so beautiful. It's so warm and cozy inside and it's also my food." Imagine -- there's lots of sort of Asian people here -- imagine you got reborn sort of in a big pile of noodles. [laughter] Or if there's any westerners here like reborn in a big hamburger so you can eat it all your day. I don't know what else you like. But he said "No I'm not going to go." Because this was his home, this was his food, this is where he belonged; he liked it. And so that heavenly being tried to pull the worm out. And remember worms which live in piles of dung are smeared with slimy shit and so it's very hard to take them out, especially when they don't want to go. So the worm would wriggle and writhe, and every time this heavenly being took it out a little bit, it would escape and go right in the middle of the dung again. Now this heavenly being, imagine like you were sort-of a high being, you had to put your hand in this most stinky, smelliest stuff. His friendship was so strong he would not give up. Because he thought "If I could just take my friend the worm up to heaven so he could just see for himself, of course he would give up his shit and come up to heavens, it's so much nicer." But of course because the worm never wanted to go, it wriggled and writhed, and escaped every time and eventually the heavenly being had to give up and leave the worm to his pile of shit.
- Two monks tell each other who they areStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: After a three-month rains retreat together, Ajahn Brahm and another Western monk sit down and tell each other what they think of each other. The description he hears of himself…
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I did a lovely experiment after when I was a monk I was spending three months in the range retreat with another Western Monk and at the end of The Retreat we sat down and we told each other what we thought of each other now honestly two monks and I was listening to his opinion of who he thought I was and it was totally different to anything I ever expected to see myself I heard myself described in another person's eyes that was not what I thought of myself and I did the same to him and he was gobsmacked too
- 'You never talked to us about your Buddhism'Story · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Ajahn Brahm kept his non-Buddhist friends from Cambridge, and saw some at a reunion after 40 years. At the end of college he had asked them what they thought of his being a…
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I remember just with those friends I was at college and I kept them and they're still there and so we had a reunion last October seeing some friends I hadn't seen for 40 years and I remember just at the end of those College years when we were going our different ways and I've be a Buddhist for all those three years at Cambridge and I asked all my friends none of them was a Buddhist and I asked him afterward what did you think about me being a Buddhist and they said we respected you said why said because you never talked to us about your Buddhism that you just respected us for who we were and that's why we respected you for who you were