Joke · Ajahn Brahm
The benefits of dying at 30,000 feet
Content note: death humour
The story — as told by Ajahn Brahm (verbatim captions)
if you die in an aircraft explosion, you know, up in to get shot down or something, there are three benefits. The three benefits of dying at 30,000 ft up in the air. The first benefit, it's, you know, it's an instant death. So there's no pain or no problem there at all. Just bang and that's it. So it's painfree. Number two, it's instant. That's actually four benefits. Instant cremation. [laughter] Oh, come on. Be realistic. Sometimes, you know, there is a backlog of people needing to be sort of cremated. I've seen the hab done many cremations say we can't do it today. We have to do it sort of on Monday or Tuesday or something public holiday or whatever. This is done on the spot. Number three, you know what you what do you do with the ashes? This is a big problem we're just talking about even today over in Bodana Monastery. All the spaces in the wall are getting full and sometimes in the ground there's no place to put your ashes. What we going to do next? But if it's an aircraft explosion, your ashes are scattered automatically. And the best the best part of this Oh, no. It's actually two more benefits. Keep in mind as I go along, honestly, how expensive are funerals? This is not just for free. It is you get money back from this with the insurance. The aircraft company gives you [laughter] a big compensation. But the best part of it not the finances. Finances are so worldly spiritually spiritually. Imagine dying at 30,000 ft. You're so close to heaven. It's easy to go
▶ Watch Ajahn Brahm tell it from 1:15:47 (to 1:17:49)
A reflection (in the spirit of Ajahn Brahm's talk)
Ajahn Brahm lists the 'benefits' of dying in a plane explosion: instant cremation, free scattering, insurance payouts, and you're already halfway to heaven. Dark humour, aimed at a real fear. Fear makes difficult situations harder. Don't blame yourself. Live in this moment, and let the fear go.
In brief (our summary)
Ajahn Brahm lists the 'benefits' of dying in an aircraft explosion: instant painless death, instant cremation (no backlog), ashes scattered automatically, insurance compensation — and spiritually you are already so close to heaven that the rest of the way is easy.
Teaching point
Told to deflate fear of catastrophe with dark humour.
When this story may help
- fear of flying
- catastrophising
Themes
Source & credit
Told by Ajahn Brahm in Confidence, Fear and Anxiety | Ajahn Brahm | 28 January 2022 · 2022-01-28 · ▶ watch from 1:15:47 to 1:17:49 · Buddhist Society of Western Australia
2 other tellings of this story
- Problems and Solutions | Ajahn Brahm | 30 Oct 2015 · 2015-10-30 · ▶ watch from 36:52 to 38:47 · Buddhist Society of Western AustraliaOct 2015 telling: three advantages — free cremation, insurance, close to heaven. Nested aside about an anagarika found dead outside his hut during the rains (cremation cost/hassle; 'don't die until after the rains') — sensitive, incomplete as a separate story, noted only here. Also MERS/Kim Jong-un Korea-travel fear framing before the joke.
- New Year's Eve with Ajahn Brahm | 31 December 2022 to 1 January 2023 · 2022-12-31 · ▶ watch from 5:26 to 6:21 · Buddhist Society of Western AustraliaNYE 2022: instant cremation / spreading ashes benefits at 30,000 feet.
Caption notes: YouTube auto-captions with machine-added punctuation; words left exactly as captioned.
The narrative is Ajahn Brahm's own telling, quoted from the talk captions. The summary and reflection are Being Mindful Stories's editorial notes. Please credit the teacher and link the original talk. Markdown version