“A very good year for romance”

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• The fortune tellers looked so poor

  In brief: In Hong Kong Ajahn Brahm was taken to a street of fortune tellers who looked ill-dressed and out in the rain — if they cannot tell their…

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  they took me to this street where all the fortune tellers were and i looked at those fortune tellers and they were just so ill dressed poor and some of them were out in the rain and i realized my goodness you call that a fortune teller they certainly can't tell their own fortune how on earth can they tell yours

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• “Please don't die during our retreat”

  In brief: At the start of the rains retreat Ajahn Brahm jokingly asks everyone not to die until October or November, since funerals break his…

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  I made an announcement last week please don't die during our retreat because if you do I have to come out of the retreat and do your funeral service for you and that breaks my meditation so just out of respect and out of kindness can you please delay your death and to the least know October or or even better November so of course there's a there's always karmic consequences when I say city jokes like that because on Monday I got an email one of my disciples died then he left it for one day and so all my plans of what I was supposed to do on Tuesday and Wednesday were thrown into turmoil as I had to go to Singapore for their funeral so on Tuesday morning at one o'clock in the morning I had to take the flight and I came back on Wednesday afternoon just you know 20 less than 24 hours in Singapore to help with the funeral service

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• From Perth Airport uncertainty to a Rolls-Royce in Armadale

  In brief: A visiting monk arrived at Perth Airport without saying which day, started walking, and within ~50 metres got a lift to Serpentine. The…

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  arrived at perth airport i knew he was coming sometime but he didn't tell me the day he was coming or the time he was coming he said he just wanted to just try just living with uncertainty and see what happens so he arrived at perth airport no one to pick him up no money or credit card or anything just started walking and i think he got to about 50 meters outside outside of the the the doors and someone stopped him in the car hey you're a mug where you going and so he said i'm going to certain time i'll give you a lift who needs taxis and you've got this lift all the way there so living with uncertainty he was actually also the mark had mentioned this story to someone today he was also the monk he was scheduled to give a talk at one of our groups which is in armadale in the armadale group and he was inviting down the monastery and that we had a very wealthy sri lankan man came to say hello and he came in a rolls royce so i think it's the only time we've seen the rolls-royce and burning down the monastery and so then it was on a tuesday afternoon and we said oh this month's got to go to the um the armadale group this evening would you like to give him a lift so he said yeah i can give him a lift so armada as many of you may know is a low socio-economic area and so it was really quite a first for a month to arrive at this group in a rolls royce and they never let him forget that is that taking a lift it's not mine anyway

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• The abbot who forecast the winter

  In brief: In a mountain monastery in Ladakh, a newly elected abbot, a poor meditator, is asked whether the winter will be cold, as the psychic old…

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  monastery in Northern India about this time of the year actually probably around the November time and the old abbot... you know had passed away and they had a new abbot. The old abbot... was working too hard and got worn out and faded away. So they had to elect this new abbot. And anyway... if you are like a head monk you are supposed to be wise and good meditator and a good leader, but you are also supposed to have a few powers... in the back pocket, just in case and one of these powers which this abbot had in this monastery in the North of India... he would always be able to... sort of you know predict you know sort of catastrophes or whatever is happening... in particular at that time of the year the other monks depended on him and they did this... this year as well... they asked the abbot... is it going to be a cold winter? up in the foothills of the Himalayas... or is it going to be a mild winter? what's going to happen? the old abbot would always be very accurate he would be able to meditate and say very cold winter, mild winter, or in-between so they asked the new abbot and the abbot said "leave it with me tonight and I'll meditate on it" the new abbot wasn't as experienced as the old one so instead of meditating on it... he got out his cell phone and rang the Meteorological office ... asked to get through to the head-guy this was actually a professor. Abbot didn't tell he was a abbot of a monastery a famous monastery all he did is say, "ah... if you don't mind me asking what's the long term weather forecast in this area of North India?" and the professor said... "well... you know it would probably be... average cold" "thank you!" and so the following morning the abbot after the chanting told all the monks... "I perceive... I predict... it's going to be just an average cold winter up here so you better collect some wood to heat the monastery so all the monks... every other duty was stopped and they went to collect some wood and after one week of hard work collecting wood they (monks) asked, "is this enough?" and the abbot said, "leave it with me" "I'll meditate tonight", he wasn't lying, he did meditate, but also rang up afterwards he rang up the meteorological office and asked, "How's it looking?" and the professor said, "actually it's got worse" "I think it's going to be quite a cold winter", Abbot, "Thank you!" So the following morning, he told all the monks, get back to work, go collect some more wood, it's going to be a cold winter up here. so they worked very hard getting some wood and then... after another week, same thing (monks) "Is this enough"... (abbot ) "leave it with me" in the night when monks were asleep he got the mobile phone out and rang the professor anonymously (abbot) "how's it looking?" (professor) "oh, it's got much worse!" "it's going to be a really cold winter" (abbot) "thank you!" ... so... next morning told monks ... "It's going to be really cold" said the head monk (abbot) "collect more wood" so they really worked hard collected wood all over the place stacking it here, stacking it there and they were really exhausted and at the end of three weeks "is this enough?" (abbot) "leave it with me" and that night he called the professor again (abbot) "how's it going?" and the professor said... "phew... I've never seen anything like this" "the signs are it's going to be one of the coldest, bitterest winters ever seen in this part of North India" and the abbot... anonymous... the professor didn't know who he was abbot, "are you sure?", professor, "yes" (abbot) "how do you know?" "well" said the professor of meteorology "All those monks in the holy monastery are collecting wood like nobody's business

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