Stories about temples
2 Buddhist wisdom stories about temples from Buddhist teachers, each linked to the original talk.
- The hypnotist monk's donation boxJoke · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: A new monk can't pay his temple's bills. A senior monk advises: close the doors, turn up the heat, give a boring monotone sermon, swing a fob watch and hypnotise everyone — 'when…
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this was a guy uh he was a a new monk. He started a new temple. has found it very very difficult to actually raise enough funds, you know, to pay the bills. And of course, you can understand why, you know, when somebody just starts out at temple, people don't know whether they're going to last. So why should you, you know, give donations when you don't know whether it's going to be used well. So he went to see a senior monk and a senior monk told him, "Well, try this technique. I tried this when I started out with my own temple. He said on a Friday night when you give a talk, make sure all the doors are closed, make sure there's no ventilation and make sure you turn the heat up so it gets very hot and stuffy. And when it's very hot and stuffy, give a boring sermon. The way to give a boring sermon, you teach it in a low tone, like a mono tone. I'm teaching a boring sermon now. And I'm sure many of you know what I'm going to say. And he said, "Then what to do when your audience are about to fall asleep, get out those old watches, you know, with the uh what they call them? Fob watches, I think. Get one of those fob watches. move it left to right, left to right, and hypnotize everybody. And once everybody's hypnotized, I say about 200 people in here. Once you're all hypnotized, then you give them the instruction. When you leave, don't forget to put donation in donation box. No coins, no fives, tens or 20s, only 50s and hundreds. He said, "I can't do that. That's illegal." And the senior monk said, "No, that's just encouraging good karma. It's good for people." So he he tried it and he made a fortune that day. He had lots of no 20s or tens or coins, just 50s and hundreds in the donation box. Worth a fortune. Imagine that. There's 200 people in here. Wow. So he decided he can't do that every day. So he waited until he needed some more money to pay the bills. And so he tried it again. He said, closed all the doors and all the windows, made it very stuffy and hot inside and started giving a boring sermon. And when people were falling asleep, he got out of his fob watch and started swinging it. But before they were hypnotized, he dropped it and it went smashed on the ground because it was surprise to him. He said the word. What did he say? I just repeated what you said. He said, "Oh shit." And that's what people did. Serves him right. a couple of weeks to clean up.
- Why shoes stay outside Buddhist templesJoke · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Someone asked why people don't wear shoes in Buddhist temples. His answer: so if he tells a bad joke, you can't throw your shoes at him — you have to leave them outside.
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someone asked me why it was that people don't wear shoes in Buddhist temples and the answer to that is because it means if I tell a bad joke you can't throw your shoes at me you have to leave them outside before you come