Stories about regret
4 Buddhist wisdom stories about regret from Buddhist teachers, each linked to the original talk.
- He almost bought lunch for the lady who looked like MumStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Stuck out of the monastery before noon, he queues at a food court behind a little old pensioner who looks like his late mother. He wants his attendant to buy her meal from…
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I remember going to a food court and the person in front of me you I was with the anara the the the attendant holding the M the person in front of me with this very old lady and she was ordering herself I think a roast meal and as soon as I saw her I thought of my old mother cuz you know she she looked about the same size the same type of curly hair and this little old lady a pensioner was just trying to get her lunch and nice probably treat for her and as soon as I saw her now the thought was in my mind I know this and I shouldn't do this I know this is not my Mindy but I wanted to ask the fellow with me you know you buy a her meal you know I want to sort of donate it because it was like my mom and you just I felt really sad and that was one moment I said no you're not really supposed to do that it's not my money it's a Buddhist society's money and I really regret that you know I think I should have done that because I thought of the consequences I lost my compassion
- I refused my girlfriend's meat curryStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: As a strict vegetarian layman his girlfriend cooks what she thinks he wants — a meat curry; he refuses; later sees how unkind the refusal was after all her trouble.
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very strict vegetarian when I was before I became a monk and as a monk I was not allowed to choose but when I was a l person I was a very strict vegetarian and my girlfriend invited me out for dinner she was cooking at dinner for me so I went out to sort of have the dinner with her and it was a really like good health food but she'd made a some sort of meat curry you know I refused to eat it and I thought just what a stupid person you are there was your girlfriend and she' gone to all this trouble trying to cook what she thought you wanted and I just refused to eat
- Jimi Hendrix drowning out Dad's Frank SinatraStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Ajahn Brahm's father, whom he loved deeply, died when Ajahn Brahm was 16. As a 14- or 15-year-old, whenever his father put on a Frank Sinatra record, he would put on Jimi Hendrix…
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I wasn't the perfect son. I did stupid things, and one of the the things I felt guilty about when my father died, which I really should have said sorry for, was a competition in our taste in music because my father would love Frank Sinatra. As for me, I loved Jimi Hendrix. (LAUGHTER) And sometimes, when he would put on his Frank Sinatra record, I would put on my Jimi Hendrix record. As you all know, Jimi Hendrix is far louder than Frank Sinatra and so I drowned his music out. It was a stupid thing but it was like, 14 or 15 year old, you're in competition with the other males in the house, even your father or your brother— that's psychology of a male growing up. And so many, many times I did that— stupid young man—and then when he died it was too late to say sorry. You know, little things like that you feel guilty about. Okay, he can listen to his— I want my father to enjoy his Frank Sinatra music and whatever, but I felt guilty about that. And I always remember from that experience: while there's still time always say sorry because the time comes when you can't say it anymore.
- The past is un-effableAnalogy · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: He coins a word-play: instead of 'ineffable' (too deep for words), the past is 'un-effable' — you cannot 'if' your past. Stop rewriting old choices; make them work now.
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IN-IF-ABLE, you can't IF the past. By that I mean you can't say "IF that, whoever it was, didn't get Covid or if they hadn't traveled or IF there was more tests or IF, you know, I wasn't busy this weekend or if, if, if." The past is "iniffable"