Swings at the bus stop

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• In Laos, war stops for lunch

  In brief: A monk friend, in Luang Prabang during the war between the communists and royalists, is eating lunch at a bamboo-and-thatch restaurant…

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  I remember one of the stories this I never saw this myself but this was told to me by one of my friends who was a monk he was in luang probang the second the city of Laos doing the the war with the Communists and the royalists and this is actually how you relax he was at one of these little restaurants you know they would fare every occupational health and safety regulation in Australia but the food was delicious you know dirty but great food bamboo and thatch that's all there was and he'd go there for his lunch he was sitting at a table eating some delicious meal and he did notice there was a government soldiers they were sitting at another table having their lunch with the M16 the old machine gun rifles leaning against the wall this was lunchtime and he was enjoying his lunch when his heart almost stopped when he saw the Communist soldiers came in they called potato at the time these were the enemy this was a watch in the Vietnam War times and the the Communists came into the restaurant and he went to dive under the table but no one else was trying to escape or dive under the table because they saw the enemy troops the Communist troops they just looked around and chose another table they put their guns against the wall and they ordered their lunch because in Laos at that time War always stops for lunch oh would it be a wonderful thing if even these days people get their priorities right and lost they'd always have a lunch break when you're free fighting a war and that's what they did those days and of course afterwards said what happened next after lunch was over all of them they had some understanding the you know the Communist troops would go one way the rewarders will go the other way so they would have to meet each other

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• “That's a beautiful baby” on the Tube

  In brief: On a depressing London Underground ride where nobody looks at anyone, Ajahn Brahm tells a young mother her baby is beautiful — a fib, he…

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  one of the hardest places to crack, for me anyway, is the London Underground. But I've succeeded many times. You know if you have ever gone in the London Underground, you're not allowed to look at each other. You've got to look down and you've got your paper and someone's looking at you. What do they want? You can do that. I remember it just very easy. You are stuck in this underground. I don't know how long. And this is depressing. So, I just saw this girl. She was holding a baby and I just okay, I told a fib. I looked up and said, that's a beautiful baby. [laughter] I don't like babies, but I said it's a beautiful baby. And that just opened this girl up. Should I really said who are you? Where are you from? Oh you are from Australia. You are a monk. We had this beautiful conversation to the very end.

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• The NHS invitation — bad for my health

  In brief: After an HR conference in London (business class, hotel, family visit paid), the UK National Health Service asked him back to Birmingham…

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  I got another invitation from uh the National Health Service in UK. They said they attended my talk they liked it. Can you please come back to London? Actually the their conference was being held in Birmingham. can you please come to Birmingham in UK to give the same talk for the National Health Service? And I replied to them. I said, "Listen, you're the National Health Service. You should know better. I've just did an international tour, a long flight all the way from from London back to Perth, and now you want me to come back again. That's bad for my health." and you're the National Health Service. The lady who invited me wrote this lovely letter back saying, "Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. That's on my desk. It cheers me up. Instead of complaining, you made me laugh. Made me happy

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• The Theravada–Mahayana boat race

  In brief: On a sightseeing trip at a conference in Vietnam, rowing through lakes and tunnels, Ajahn Brahm (representing Singapore) is in a boat of…

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  I went to a conference in Vietnam a couple of years ago, and if you go to conferences, big organised conferences, the organisers want you to see some of the sights. I don't like being a tourist but you had no choice. So I was in the middle of Vietnam somewhere, to these lakes and underground tunnels and stuff, where you go through in a barge, fascinating beautiful place but on the way back... Actually, weird, I was representing Singapore, not Australia, so I was in the Singapore boat and there was another Singapore boat, we had the Theravada monks in our boat, and the Mahayana monks in the other boat, so I looked at them and said "Right, a race, who's better, the Mahayana or the Theravada? [laughter]. Those are the two parts of Buddhist so we had a race between Mahayana and Theravada. I was in the Theravada boat paddling for all I could and the Mahayana monks were paddling really hard as well just to see who would win, and of course it's obvious, the Theravada would win, it's obvious, if you know anything about Buddhism, because the Mahayana, they are Boddhisatvas, they even let other people get to Enlightenment before they do, so they made us get to the finishing line before they did, that's their tradition [laughter].

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