Five Angels in the fifth race

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• The Singapore spirits helped the Ang Mo

  In brief: An English ex-army dental technician with a Singaporean wife visits the in-laws, gets bored, and is taken to the races. They clean a messy…

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  he was an English man he was in the British army he was just not fighter he was like a dental technician or something so you know pretty sort of easy job but he was posted off to Singapore when the British was still in Singapore and there met this nice girl and married her so he had a Singapore wife and they they moved down to Liv in Perth where they've been living for many years and he told me that once when he was visiting Singapore know with his wife's family and his wife was chatting nagnag nagnag and he got really bored you know talking about all this stuff you know what it's like know meeting you know your other partners uh your partner's family so well they were all sort of U walking and shouting and eating he was getting very bored and his brothers-in-law saw that and said look we're going to the racetrack this afternoon we'd like to come along and he never likes gambling or going to the RAC trck but there was much better than facing his wife's family so he said okay I'll go so they took him to the racetrack but this is Singapore no Chinese no Chinese Buddhists before you go to the RAC track you have to visit the lucky Temple so they went to a lucky Temple you know in the back streets of Singapore somewhere and as soon as I walked in it was a mess you know it was just ash everywhere papers and stuff so and this is an important part of this um process if you're going to be lucky you got to do some good karma first of all please remember that so if ever you go to the racetrack or the casino come to D Loa Center and do some sweeping or some weeding first of all otherwise you got no chance so he he went to the temple and they saw it a mess so they spent about half an hour or an hour cleaning the place up and once they clean the place up then you know know what those we call them jtic Buddhists you know in our tradition getting a few justics and no one actually knows why they do this they just do that cuz their grandmother did it and I don't know what it is it doesn't make any difference how much you shake these things but anyway they did the shake of the joysticks and they put it in the um in the uh the whatever it is the jostick holder and then they went over cuz we don't do this sort of stuff in the forest tradition is very simple and very rational we don't have all this Superstition stuff but nevertheless I know that um you know I don't know why this is where this came from and all these Lottery outlets in Perth you have these big fat Buddhas and you're supposed to rub tummy for luck don't what you do that for and sometimes I'm getting a bit fat now and sometimes people come up and they want to rub my belly no way anyway actually I did open a lot ofy store I'm just really going off the C because sometimes as a monk people friends say you know they're opening up a new business or going into a new house and sometimes it's part of the tradition you know come and invite a monk to actually um to bless a place so some time ago they said my friend that they're opening up a new shop in some shopping center better not tell you which one it is and so said okay yeah they never told me it was a lottery shop and we not supposed to get involved in these sorts of things as much you know we're supposed to tell people not to gamble and it's the Buddha actually said gambling is like um is an addiction it's the wrong thing to do but nevertheless I got caught that way and I was there just I should have asked what shop I was going to uh be blessing when one day people ask me to bless a pub or sometimes even worse if I don't ask but anyway I went into the place it was too late now so I did a bit a blessing but actually they a few weeks later they got a jackpot there so these blessings are really good but anyhow where was I oh was back in this Singapore Singapore so they cleaned up the temple and they did lots of good car and they went to the racetrack it's amazing you know the result they all lost but never this I had a bit of fun but that night that night this English man no a Singapore girl he had a dream and again one of these very clear dreams which you remember and so he woke up and the dream guess what it was he dreamt of a of a horse race you know seeing it his dream and he dreamt the horse which won the name of that horse this is true story he remembered that name when he woke up and just for interest look in the morning paper the straight times in the horse racing it was running that day exactly that name so the first thing he did you know being fair he rang up all his brothers-in-law and said hey that Temple which we blessed or we cleaned up the other day there must be some sort of heavenly being or some Spirit guarding the place cuz they told me the name of the the horse which is going to win today and it's in look this is the name it's in the Strait's times they're racing today let's all go to the race track we get our money back which we lost yesterday and make a bit more sounds reasonable but his brothers-in-law said listen so you're what we call an Ang Mo people are laughing here no that means like red that means like a Westerner like a foreigner in Singapore he said that was a Singapore Temple any Spirit there they would not tell one of you guys certainly not an English guy they would tell us we don't had any dreams so you just you you you're just imagining it they said so because they thought that a Singaporean like a Chinese Spirit would never never tell an English person they never went to the track he went alone and that horse won and he put a lot of money on it cuz he was convinced he Dre it and that horse ran and he made a lot of money what he lost yesterday was insignificant to what he what he won and the worst thing was that when he went home and he told his brothers hey that horse I told you about it won that day made a lot of money oh his brothers-in-law they were ropable they were so upset and angry

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• The nun who hit the jackpot

  In brief: Driving a famous Buddhist nun to Heathrow after a retreat, her driver puts spare coins in a pub fruit machine and, saying the nun has…

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  there was a famous Buddhist nun uh who uh was teaching a Meditation Retreat in England and after she finished teaching the retreat she went down to um to hro airport and on the way they stopped for something to eat it was was a lunchtime so they stopped in one of these restaurants which was next to a pub if ever you been to London or not to London sorry to England a lot of the places where you can get something to eat on a journey they got a pub next door so you have to go in the front of the pub to get into the restaurant so they they went through the front of the pub to get into the restaurant and had their meal I know the person who told me this story because she's from Sydney and she validated this was a real story it happened when they the driver came out of the pub she had a few English coins spare so she decided to put them in one of these slot machines the Poke machines just to get rid of the coins because you know the few little coins you can't change at the uh the currency exchange it's too small you know you change about6 and you have to pay10 commissions so you end up sort of losing on the deal but anyhow she put a few coins in the slot and she had one in the slot when the Buddhist nun came out from her meal and she said to the Buddhist nun you have got much better Karma than I have you pull the handle and in one moment of lack of mindfulness just on the spur of the moment sometimes you're thinking of something else people ask you out of compassion you just do it and that's what she did the Buddhist nun pulled the handle and the wheels went round and round and round and then first one stopped jackpot second one stopped jackpot third one stopped jackpot ding ding ding ding ding ding ding and all this money started pouring out of the machine and we monks and nuns were not even allowed to touch the stuff and she couldn't afford it was falling all over her she'd won the jackpot now you may think that's now lucky but it's not lucky cuz what happened next was all the patrons in the bar went silent this Buddhist nun in a strange Rob had won the jackpot and the next thing which happened was a b man took a little bell and rang it and announced to the nun that it was the tradition it was the rule which could not be broken that whoever won the jackpot had to buy a free round of drinks for everybody in the bar and it was the first time in 2,500 years that the buddist none had to buy a whiskey a beer gin and tonics for all the people in that's what happens

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• The channelled spirit at the roulette table

  In brief: A man channels a powerful being who gives him lots of advice; what he really wants is cash. “Go to the casino… the roulette table… put $10…

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  Here comes another joke about this person, and he channeled this powerful being and this powerful being gave all this advice, and the guy said, 'Well, look, it's nice having advice, but what I really want is some cash.' Okay, said this powerful being 'go to the casino.' So he went to the casino, and a powerful being said, 'go to the roulette table.' So he went to the roulette table. And this being said; he could hear it in his ears; channeling it. He said 'put $10 on number 19.' And the wheel went around, and the ball sat on number 19. 'Put all your winnings on number 22' said the being, He could hear it in his ears. Put all the winnings on number 22. And the ball went in number 22. 'Put all the winnings, he said, on number 16.' And he put all the winnings on number 16. the ball went round, and it fell in number 17. And he heard the being say "shit!" (laughter from audience) So even powerful beings make mistakes sometimes.

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• The monk in the front seat of the bus

  In brief: Thais believe a monk's good karma protects those behind him, so monks are seated at the front of buses. Travelling from Chonburi to…

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  this happened once accurate story I was traveling from chury to Bangkok not a long distance only 2 hours thank goodness cuz as soon as I got in this big bus the bus driver smiled he didn't want to take any money he just put me right in the front seat about that far from the wind screen because there was a movie on that bus which he really wanted to to watch but he was scared of crashes so he always had to pay attention to the road now I was there taking care of crashes he could watch the movie as much as he wanted and I was watching all these big trucks and cars just hurtling towards our buz as was going over the road to the other side fortunately we survived so it's obviously it was true but I tried that once when I was flying in tight Airways I was in economy class and I told the flight attendant you know sometimes uh aircraft crash into mountains so why don't you put me up front and then I can protect everyone behind because you know up front is first class on his business I thought it was a very strong argument but they wouldn't accept it so so I had to stay in economy

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