How big is my hand?

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• Wait at the crossroads for the bus

  In brief: Simile from Opening the Door of Your Heart: a decision is like arriving at a crossroads. You don't have to go north, south, east or west —…

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  In my book “Opening the door of your heart” I said it’s like coming into the crossroads in life. Coz decisions are like crossroads. What should you do? Get married? Become a nun? Sort of go overseas? Kill yourself? I don’t know. But whatever decision you’re about to make, stop for a while, put all the information in Like coming to a crossroads, you sit down. You don’t have to go left, right, north or south. Sit down and wait for the bus. Coz in the crossroad there’s also a bus coming. And most busses have the destination written on the front. And if that’s the place you want to go, then get on that bus. If you don’t want to go to that destination, don’t get on. Coz there’s always another bus coming behind. What that means is that when there is a decision to be made, wait; learn how to put it down. You don’t have to struggle to go north, south, east or west. You can stay still and wait for the solution to arrive. And it does arrive.

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• The social worker's solutions that popped up

  In brief: A senior social worker with heavy responsibilities arrives at a nine-day retreat in North Perth at 8:30 p.m., straight from the office…

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  A classic case is one of the old members here who died a year ago. She came on this meditation retreat which I gave a couple of years ago. And she was a very high profile social worker, senior social worker, had lots of responsibilities. So the retreat which we give, the nine day retreats, they usually start at about seven o’clock. I don’t think she turned up till about eight thirty. Because she was working at her office, getting all of the papers and stuff done and she couldn’t leave it. I don’t think she had any dinner. She came straight from her office to the retreat center in North Perth. Tired, but you know, obviously I told her to rest for a couple of days before she can really got into the meditation. But she told me at the interview a few days later that she had come to the retreat straight from the office finishing very late, with all of these problems, big problems. But she was wise enough, she heard those teachings many times before. When she came to the retreat center, she completely forgot about them for two or three days. She done all of her research, she got all of the information, she just hadn’t processed them. And just three days, she was meditating there quite quietly, and her mind was very peaceful and these solutions started popping up. And she said when she basically listened to the solutions in her mind, she didn’t know where they came from, they just came up, popped up, she said: “Wow, these are really good solutions!” And she was so impressed with these solutions which came up automatically, she told me afterwards. She said: “As soon as I go back home, I’m going to implement these things. These are innovative I can see just how they are gonna work.” But she also said there’s no way . she could have thought of those solutions It was a decision making which arrived by putting in all of the information and waiting, and waiting for the brain, the mind, to process these things and for the decision to come up.

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• Toss a coin to find out what you want

  In brief: Advice for a hard decision: toss a coin — heads I marry her, tails I don't. If it comes up heads and you think 'two out of three?', you…

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  But, if you read my book, you toss a coin, you marry her, tails I get divorced. Oh no, you can't get divorced until you're married. Heads I marry her, tails I don't. And the point is, once it comes up heads, how do you feel? Heads I marry her, do you think 2 out of 3? In other words, you're not happy with the decision. Then of course what that's telling you is how you feel inside. If it comes up heads, heads I marry her, yes! That means you really want to do it in the first place. So tossing a coin, it's finding out what you really want to do. So you make a decision, heads I go left, tails I go right. After you've tossed a coin, how do you feel? What's the emotion inside? It's just getting that intuition up to your brain.

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• “Is this heavy?” — Ajahn Chah and the stick

  In brief: Walking back from alms round, Ajahn Chah picks up a stick and asks the young Ajahn Brahm whether it is heavy, then throws it away: it is…

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  The first way of letting go, it was starting off with an old experience with my teacher Ajahn Chah, a long time ago, we were walking back from alms round and a great teacher, they always find an opportunity to, sort of you know, give you some teaching, but not these teachings with so many words and big concepts just simple down-to-earth teachings which once you hear, you think "Crikey, that's really good," and you remember it, and it changes much of your life. What he did on this occasion walking back, he picked up this stick, there's forest all over the place, picked up a stick, turned around and says "Brahmavamso, is this heavy?" Is this heavy? [throws stick away] Not now. I was very careful, I didn't throw that too far, wonder what it's gonna bust. It's only heavy when you hold it. But if you let it go it's got no weight at all. Profound, simple, and unforgettable.

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