The torn-up degrees his mother taped back together

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• Walking off with everything he owned on his back

  In brief: After five years as a monk in Thailand (around 1979) Ajahn Brahm leaves his monastery to wander on foot. Nothing can be stored, so he must…

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  One of my most memorable experiences in my training as a monk after 5 years being a monk in these monasteries in Thailand you are expected, encouraged to actually leave the monastery, just go wondering on foot. Its a great opportunity to visit other teachers' You have been in a one monastery and to see how the other teachers teach To get a wider experience or may be go and find some solitude in the jungles or the mountains That was after five years--what would that be 1979 or something; somewhere around then. I left the monastery; and the rule was you couldn't store anything there. You can give it away but once you gave it away nothing would be kept for you. So everything which was yours you had to carry with you. And of course if you are walking especially through the hot tropics carrying lots and lots of stuff is just really really unpleasant. It was reminding you how much a burden your possessions were. So after a couple of days, you gave this away and you gave that away and you are down to the absolute minimum you needed Once you got down to that minimum, my goodness it was so light. You can imagine the experience. Just put yourself in that experience that everything you own you are carrying on your back and it's light. And you can dance, there is hardly any burden there at all. Because as a monk we knew that, there are monasteries everywhere any place you go you can get a bed for the night. If you don't get a bed for the night you can sleep under a tree. Its the tropics, it is easy to do. You can go anywhere, you get something to eat, not delicious food but enough to keep you going through the day, there is waters in the well. There was this total sense of freedom freedom from possessions. And that was just like being in heaven. You didn't have any worries at all. You had cloths to wear, you had this little mosquito net umbrella which you could park anywhere to sleep at night. And the best thing about it; you had no appointments. Your future was blank. I could go anywhere I wanted. Every cross road, you can go left, go right, turn around, go forward, stay still No one was asking you to go anywhere, to do anything or be anything. That was one of my wonderful experiences of being free from attachments at all.

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• The Biggest Loser

  In brief: Challenging the slur 'loser', Ajahn Brahm lists what he lost becoming a monk — money, girlfriends, possessions, a nice motorbike — sleeps…

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  look I admit I'm a loser I've lost so much becoming a Muk I lost all my money I lost my girlfriends I lost all my possessions I lost my motorbike had a really nice motorbike so really in this whole world because now look at me I just sleep on the floor you know I've just got no possessions I've got no super annuation I've got no TV I've got no mobile phone I've got nothing you know in this Australia you know I claim the title is The Biggest Loser because I've let go so much so why is it that people say you're a loser see people said look at me a from you're a loser say yes thank you so much it's wonderful being a loser come and join me

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• Oh my God — the Fremantle Docker

  In brief: Four Catholic mothers compare pride: one son's a priest (Father), one's a bishop (Your Grace), one's a cardinal (Your Eminence). The…

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  There was four mothers having a cup of coffee in Cottesloe somewhere. (LAUGHTER) And one of the mothers said, "This round of coffee is on me because I'm celebrating. Today," she said, "Today, this morning, my son became a Catholic priest." She said, "I'm so proud of him," —this is a bunch of Catholics because it doesn't work if it's not Catholic, nothing against Catholics, (LAUGHTER) it doesn't work otherwise— and she said, "Now, everybody in his church bows and calls him father. I'm so, so proud of my son." And then the next lady, another Catholic, she sniffs and says, "Ah, that's nothing. Only a priest? My son became a priest ten years ago. Now, he is a bishop; he's a bishop. When he, in his church, people go on one knee; they kiss his ring and they call him: Your Grace! Your Grace! I'm so proud of him." The third lady, she sips her coffee and says: "Only a bishop? My son was a bishop five years ago. He is now a cardinal. When he comes into the church, everybody gets down on both knees and they call him: Your Eminence! Your Eminence! I'm so proud of my son. He's now a cardinal." Then they all look at the fourth lady. and the fourth lady finishes her coffee, and she says: "That's nothing; that's nothing at all. My son... my son never joined any church; my son...my son joined the Fremantle Dockers. He is 6 foot 4 inches tall; he's drop-dead gorgeous; when he comes into a room, all the girls go right on the floor, and say: Oh my God! Oh my God! (LAUGHTER) I'm so proud of him." (LAUGHTER) Okay. for those who are listening overseas, Fremantle Dockers is one of the footy teams over here. Please, excuse me, if you're an Eagle supporters, but I try and balance it every time

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• The mother who never drops her baby

  In brief: Simile from the Mirrabooka shopping centre: mothers carry their babies through jostling crowds with a trolley in the other hand and never…

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  I see these uh mothers with their baby in their arms. And they've got the sort of the trolley in their other arm or something. And they navigate through these shopping centers and there's lots of people bumping this way and bumping that way. They never drop their kid. Never ever. And the kid knows it so much. The kid is fast asleep. Totally trusts his mother not to drop him. But you, you know, you so watch your breath and you drop it after 5 minutes. And worse, you don't know where you've left it. But imagine that. The mother is Is a mother who's gone in the shopping center with the kid and gone back home afterwards. Say, "I I thought I had the baby with me. Where did I leave the baby? I had it somewhere." Cuz why is it the mother never drops a baby? Why is it the mother never leaves it and forgets where they've left it? Cuz the mother cares for the baby. That's all. She's not tense. She's just got this beautiful constant care. Which means the baby is always safe, never gets dropped, never gets left anywhere. See, that care is the important ingredient of mindfulness. That's what maintains it. If you care for the stages of meditation, so you care for this present moment. Don't need to control it. Don't need to force it. Don't need to hold the baby so hard you strangle the poor thing. No, you just hold it gently and you care for it and then you'll never drop it.

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