Being Mindful Stories

Story · Ajahn Brahm

She sat on the stone stairs when thunder came

As told by Ajahn Brahm in Living in Harmony | Ajahn Brahm | 24 November 2023

1 min read

Content note: war; trauma

The story — as told by Ajahn Brahm (verbatim captions)

Every time there was a thunderstorm over that part of London and the lightning bmed and cracked, it would bring back the memories of that episode during the Second World War. And whatever she was doing, she would stop and go and sit on the stairs. It was a second story flat she was living in. She would sit there because she was taught as a young woman that was the safest place in the house in wooden houses. The stairs were made of uh mostly um stone. They were tougher. So that's where she would sit. And after the thunderstorm had passed, she come back and join us. That was her way of dealing with it. It may not be the standard way but that was the way which worked for her

▶ Watch Ajahn Brahm tell it from 16:22 (to 17:16)

A reflection (in the spirit of Ajahn Brahm's talk)

A woman who lived through the London Blitz would stop whatever she was doing during thunderstorms and sit on the stone stairs, the safest spot she'd been taught. When it passed, she rejoined everyone. It wasn't the textbook way, but it worked for her. Respect how others cope with their pain, and find your own way through yours.

In brief (our summary)

A London Blitz survivor, years later, stops whatever she is doing at every thunderstorm and sits on the stone stairs — the safest place she was taught as a young woman. After the storm she rejoins the company.

Teaching point

What works for one person's trauma may not be the textbook way — honour what actually helps.

When this story may help

  • PTSD triggers
  • family elders

Themes

Source & credit

Told by Ajahn Brahm in Living in Harmony | Ajahn Brahm | 24 November 2023 · 2023-11-25 · ▶ watch from 16:22 to 17:16 · Buddhist Society of Western Australia

3 other tellings of this story

Caption notes: YouTube auto-captions with machine-added punctuation; words left exactly as captioned. 'bmed' = boomed.

The narrative is Ajahn Brahm's own telling, quoted from the talk captions. The summary and reflection are Being Mindful Stories's editorial notes. Please credit the teacher and link the original talk. Markdown version

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    this is the story I told this at a conference on mental health during the wintertime last year, and that was over in the convention centre in Perth. And they were the person came up to me afterwards and said, she apologised to me, because she said, "When I first saw you coming into our conference", now please excuse the language. This is what she said, "I thought who is this wanker coming to our conference?" And she came to apologise for thinking like that, because I made her laugh, I made her cry, what made her cry. These were clients who have been through mental health problems. And were just trying to do something to improve the service for others. So the story which made her cry, is my story of the the trees in the forest. I often use this when people go to Bodhinyana monastery or go to Jhana Grove, but you know, don't need to say it there, say it here as well. If you go this weekend and go for a walk in the forest somewhere, please find a perfect tree for me. A tree which has got all of the branches equally spaced, only green leaves, no yellow leaves, no brown leaves, no leaves which have been eaten by the insects, which is perfectly straight, not crooked, or leaning to the left or the right. And with a bark, which hasn't been damaged by the bush fires or by the winds and things hitting it. A bark without scars on it. If you can find such a tree, you'll be the first in the world to find a tree in the natural forests because every tree you look at them. They're all bent and crooked. They've all got branches which have fallen off and that leaves holes where the birds and other animals can nest. And if you look at the leaves, there's lots of yellow leaves and brown leaves and leaves which have been eaten by insects and all the trees are crooked and bent. And the scars on their bark, they're just the bark is really rough, and knobbly and scarred. They're the beautiful trees. And I said in this talk if you are one of those trees, all bent and crooked, with heaps of scars on the bark with branches which have been ripped off by the storms of your life. You belong as one of the beautiful trees in the forest, you're my favourites. Because certainly I like the crooked trees, the bent trees, with all the scars and the knobbly bits on the outside. They're the ones which are beautiful.

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  • Paṭācārā, who lost everything

    In brief: Paṭācārā, from a good family, runs away with her low-born lover. Pregnant, she tries to return to her parents to give birth but delivers…

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    But I always tell them about one of the greatest nuns that ever was. Her name was Patara. And her story was that she'd run away with her lover. She came from a very good family. Her lover I think was just a lowborn. But they loved each other were both very good. And eventually she had a child and they thought if they go back to their parents' house, you know, when they just let themelves or let them her give birth in her parents' house, that would actually make the parents a bit more amunable to her husband. But they she gave birth on the way. So they went straight back to their village. And so they tried that a second time. And again she gave a like a few days premature birth and I was in the forest and after the new baby was born. Her husband who you know just really looked after her, loved her to bits, went looking for some wood to keep her warm and took a piece of wood but it was a snake and the snake bit him and he died. So, so she'd just given birth to her second child and now she lost her husband, Snakebite. So, she decided she had to go back to see her parents. No husband had died. She had two kids. But then she had to cross a big stream which was in flood and she had like a two or three year old kid and a new baby. What should she do? So she put the baby or she put the the told the new kid no told her two or three year old son you wait on this bank and I'll wade across the stream with the new baby and then I'll put the baby down on the other side and come for you and if I if you see me waving or something then just come straight away. So she got across the stream with her new kid, put the kid down sort of in a safe place on the dry bank, and then waited back again to get her elder son. But as she was midstream, she saw a big eagle come and swoop on her little baby. And of course, she was frantic. She waved her hands around trying to scare the bird away. But instead, the bird wasn't scared. She was in the middle of the stream. So, the bird took away her baby. And her 2-year-old kid thought mommy was calling him and weded into the river and got swept away. So, now she lost two kids. And if that wasn't bad enough, when she was trying to make her way back to her village that she heard from somebody there had been a big storm in that village the night before and her two parents had been killed in the storm. She'd lost her two children, parents and her husband on the same day. Now you can imagine what grief does to you. She went mad, crazy. She didn't know what to do, where to go. But eventually, she wandered into the temple totally naked and screaming her head off. And she when she walked into the temple, the Buddha was giving a sermon. And so people there at the edge of the the crowd, the congregation, the audience said, "You can't come in here. You're badly dressed. you're crazy. But the Buddha said, "No, let her in." You know, she was a young woman, you know, just given birth to a couple of children, maybe in her 20ies, and the Buddha out of kindness said, "Let her in." And one of the monks got his robe and put it around her so she was a little bit more uh decent. And that was the start of Patara's um entry into being a a nun. And one of the reasons I tell that story as a great tragedy, great grief. But then that nun became one of the most famous teachers in the whole of the nuns community. cuz this is just not what other people tell me cuz I remember just reading all these stories of great nuns in the time of the Buddha. And I think many of you may be able to relate to this. Sometimes you've been meditating and meditating and meditating and practicing going on retreats but sometimes you're getting nowhere. You feel my meditation a brah talks about these nimitas and janna and stuff like that. I've got nowhere near that. Why not? And this was some of the nuns were like that. And then they said, you know, in their little record of their enlightenment that this great nun came and taught them how to meditate. And they were just enlightened within a few days. And that nun's name was Patara. That was her amazing teacher.

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  • I am the Thai pirate

    In brief: Early in his monkhood Ajahn Brahm was spun around by a poem of Thich Nhat Hanh from the boat-people years: I am the refugee, the pregnant…

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    poem by Venable tikat Hanan now you know he was a Vietnamese Monk and he was in his early years before he became famous he was really looking after the Vietnamese Community who had escaped from Vietnam on boats risking their lives many of them didn't make it the boats were even worse than they are these days most people died at Sea those people who survived were raped by Tha Pirates their money their collections disappeared it was a terrible terrible time and there any Vietnamese people here you know you understand what I mean and this monk wrote this poem which was both shock it just span me around but gave me an insight into how such conflicts can be resolved I can't remember the poem properly but it was something like I am I am the refugee in a boat tossed on the waves I am the woman pregnant in that boat I am the woman raped by the Thai pirate I am the Thai pirate raping this woman I am the Tai pirate stealing the money I am all of those people

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  • She had to sign children away from their parents

    In brief: A highly educated Thai woman on retreat carries the job of signing final judgments that remove children from parents too damaged by…

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    She was very highly educated Thai lady. And she was had a terrible, terrible, terrible job. It's the job she had was she had to sign off on people uh who she had to give the final judgment were in her opinion not capable looking after their kids. And when she signed that document, the children would be taken away from their parents

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