Stories for relationships
4 Buddhist wisdom stories for relationships from Buddhist teachers, each linked to the original talk.
- One sentence every seven yearsJoke · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: In a strict silent monastery a monk may say one sentence to the abbot every seven years. After seven years, the wise words he rehearsed vanish and he blurts: 'The food in this…
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This is an old joke about this man who joined a monastery, and as he joined this monastery, was a very strict monastery, where you weren't allowed to speak at all, its absolute silence except after seven years, you are allowed to say one sentence to the abbot, the idea was so he could have some idea of your spiritual progress. So this young man joined this very strict monastery. And after six years, 11 months and 30 days of absolute silence, you can imagine his excitement when the next morning he could say his first sentence to the abbot. So he decided to practice in his cell something wise, you know, to inspire his abbot, something very meaningful something, you know, like one saying you find in a book. And he practices this amazing wise saying, when he went into the abbot's room, his mind went totally blank, you know what it's like, and the words which came out was “the food in this place is terrible”. Now the point was he didn't have another chance to say a word, he'd had his sentence and he'd blown it and he felt so terrible! Now he has to wait another seven years. So 13 years 11 months and 30 days, now he had his second chance to say something, and this time he was more relaxed, you know, spiritual life had done something, he is more in control of himself. So he had a good night's sleep, really relaxed, rested and his wise words he was supposed to say seven years ago, he went to open his mouth and again he forgot and the words which came out he said “you make us work too hard.” Very good, said the abbot, come back in another seven years. He blown at the second time! And of course, after twenty-one years, now he was totally at ease and he went into the Abbot office, he said precisely what he intended to say, his one sentence was this: “can't stand this place any longer, I'm leaving.” And the abbot replied “very good because you've done nothing but complain ever since you came here.”
- Perfect partner? Get a TV — or a dogJoke · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Advice: want someone always there, listening, entertaining, quiet on demand — get a TV; always happy to see you — get a dog; don't expect a human to be that hospital-perfect.
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perfect partner then just what one person told me years ago if you want a real perfect partner somebody who's always there for you you can always listen to you or sometimes speak to you as always can entertain you there can be quiet when you want them to be quiet then get a TV well if you want someone who's just always happy to see you then get a dog
- Sunsets need cloudsAnalogy · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: Simile from the hills at Serpentine: the best sunsets come when there's cloud or dust in the sky; the imperfections spread the light into crimsons and gold. Without them the…
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Sometimes there are some very glorious sunsets. But the best sunsets are always when there's a cloud in the sky, or when there's some dust from a hot day, `a windy day. As it's the dust, it's the imperfections, which spread the light into these glorious crimsons and gold. When they're not there, the sunset isn't beautiful. It's imperfection, which is the cause of beauty. It's imperfection which creates this beauty in our world.
- The retreat that ended a romanceStory · Ajahn Brahm
In brief: As a Cambridge student with a lovely girlfriend (not a Buddhist), Ajahn Brahm asks her permission to go on a meditation retreat; she says go. On one meditation it goes so deep it…
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I still remember the time when I had a very wonderful relationship with my girlfriend at the time and then I asked her permission. Actually I asked her so there's a retreat on a meditation retreat. I was a Buddhist at the time and she said yeah please go off have a nice retreat. She wasn't a Buddhist she wasn't interested in that but nevertheless I went there by myself and meditated. What is meditating? Just what I said, just sitting down, letting go of everything, relaxing your body, being happy to be here. And just on one of those meditations, it got so incredibly deep. That was some of the biggest happiness I've ever experienced in my life. Bliss. Many of you may have heard about um hermits or religious people who are getting into these incredible bliss states and what's it like? And of course, just as they say, just so much joy, so much peace, so much love, so much happiness and freedom from everything else. And once you can taste that type of freedom from suffering, otherwise known as bliss, I feel sorry now for that girlfriend. That was the end of that relationship.