# The naughty hour from three to four - Teacher: Ajahn Brahm - Type: Story - URL: https://beingmindfulstories.com/stories/brahm-young-monk-naughty-hour-3-to-4 - Themes: meditation, thinking, monastic life, humour - Life situations: racing thoughts on retreat, early monastic struggle ## Synopsis (editorial summary) As a young monk in a silent forest paradise (one car a week) he fights thoughts — including old girlfriends — until exhausted. At the Buddha shrine he makes a deal: 3–4pm is 'naughty monk time' for any fantasy; the rest of the day the mind behaves. At 3pm, exhausted, he gives permission — and for a full hour watches every breath without missing one. ## The story, as told by Ajahn Brahm (verbatim captions) so that was Paradise for me and so I thought wow this is it I'm going to have a really lovely time and it was a lovely time for the first week or two and then I started thinking and I was only a young mik at the time so you know I didn't really know how to deal with this you know what I did when I started thinking I started to try and stop the thoughts come on stop it watch the breath come on watch your breath and that just made the thoughts worse and worse and worse and they kept going faster and stronger and more weird and soon I was starting to think I don't mind telling the story I started to think of old girlfriends I wonder if she's still available now shut up a bom you're a monk wonder where she is now oh watch your breath and all these really weird thoughts now I like being a monk but you know like you want to meditate but still these thoughts come in and you know they're Uninvited and get out of here and they come in even stronger do you know what I mean you know you're trying to get rid of those thoughts which come into your mind all sorts of stupid ones but you know you can't get rid of them and I was fighting and fighting and fighting until I just got exhausted and you was so frustrated now if ever you come across that frustration during this Retreat remember this is what you're supposed to do I just couldn't stand in the WR I didn't know what to do I just could not get these stupid thoughts out of my head so I went to there's no other monk there to talk to and I was too embarrassed to talk to the late people about what I was thinking so I went into the shrine bowed to the Buddha statue and just asked for some sort of inspiration and the inspiration came and it was do a deal make a make a an agreement and the agreement was this that I would meditate on my breath you know for most of the day but I would give myself a time like a naughty monk time 3: to 4:00 p.m. every afternoon I could think whatever I wanted I was not going to try and stop it or criticize it sexual fantasies romance anything I would let happen from 3: to 4 so I thought okay M if you want to do that 3 to 4 is your your your naughty time if you want to call it that whatever you want to think about you can think about it and I won't stop you I would let you let it happen I I promise to the Buddha I won't stop it from 3: to 4: but the rest of the time you behave now you know that sounded so reasonable and logical to me at the time and I tried that you know it was just still such a fight you know trying to sort of keep these thoughts out and so when it got to 3:00 I was really tired so I just lent against the wall you know and put my feet out cuz they were just aching and I said right now I'm going to keep my bargain mine for the next hour you can think anything you want and I won't try and stop you at all the weirdest sexual fantasies old girlfriends whatever you want to think about off you go and for the next hour no joke no exaggeration the next hour I watched every breath without missing one and I couldn't believe it ## Teaching point Fighting the mind strengthens it; befriending it with a fair deal lets silence win. ## Reflection (in the spirit of Ajahn Brahm's talk) Worn out from fighting his thoughts, young Ajahn Brahm struck a deal: from three to four, his mind could think anything at all. At three he gave permission, and for an hour he followed every breath without a gap. Fighting feeds the mind's restlessness. Befriend it, and it settles of its own accord. ## Source - [3 Overcoming thinking - Ajahn Brahm](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nlB3uksRV8M) (BSWA Retreats 2011-15 & Media) — watch from 39:49 to 43:25: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nlB3uksRV8M&t=2389s