# “That was the worst tape I've ever heard”

- Teacher: Ajahn Brahm
- Type: Story
- URL: https://beingmindfulstories.com/stories/brahm-worst-tape-ever
- Themes: learning, failure, process over outcome, humour
- Life situations: beginner at a new skill, fear of public speaking, harsh feedback

## Synopsis (editorial summary)

Angie, later president of the Buddhist Fellowship in Singapore, finds a 23-year-old cassette of one of Ajahn Brahm's early talks in the monastery library, plays it to see how he has changed, and tells him it was the worst talk she has ever heard. He laughs: that's when he was learning.

## The story, as told by Ajahn Brahm (verbatim captions)

I remember that we had, I don't mind mentioning her, she's the current president of the Buddhist Fellowship in Singapore, Angie. You know, she's a very strong disciple of mine. She came to stay at a monastery down at Serpentine some years ago, and she was just pottering around in the library, and she managed to get one of these old talks of mine on the cassette tapes. And I think it was about 20 years ago, 23 years ago. And she thought, this is really interesting, I want to see how much this monk has changed over 23, 24 years. And she played the tape and she came up afterwards, she said, Ajahn Brahm, that was the worst tape I've ever heard. That was terrible talk. And I laughed and said, yeah of course, that's just when you're learning.

## Teaching point

Care for the effort in each moment rather than the result; skill comes through the process.

## Reflection (in the spirit of Ajahn Brahm's talk)

Years later a student played one of his early talks and told him it was the worst she'd ever heard. He laughed: that was when he was learning. Every skill starts out clumsy. If you care about the effort rather than the applause, your early awkward attempts are nothing to be ashamed of; they're how you got here.

## Source

- [Don't Be Disappointed | Ajahn Brahm | 29-01-2010](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LmlQ9qGomG0) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 12:39 to 13:27: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LmlQ9qGomG0&t=759s

Other tellings of this story:

- [No-Self Esteem | by Ajahn Brahm](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hXd09oGHD0I) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 19:05 to 19:24: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hXd09oGHD0I&t=1145s
- [Hope | Ajahn Brahm | 8 April 2016](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O6OXWEWAeNE) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 33:02 to 33:35: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O6OXWEWAeNE&t=1982s