# Families around the toothpaste-tube lamp

- Teacher: Ajahn Brahm
- Type: Story
- URL: https://beingmindfulstories.com/stories/brahm-thai-village-oil-lamp-families
- Themes: family, simplicity, happiness, poverty and wealth
- Life situations: family disconnection, too much screen time, materialism

## Synopsis (editorial summary)

In his first weeks in a poor Northeast Thai village — no electricity, dirt roads, no TV — Ajahn Brahm walks through at night to a chanting. On every stilt-house veranda, by the light of one home-made oil lamp (a rag through a cut-off toothpaste tube, dipped in cheap kerosene), the whole family sits in a semicircle: grandma telling ghost stories, grandpa telling tall tales of Bangkok, little children listening. House after house, the same scene — and he realises how much he, from a privileged background, had missed.

## The story, as told by Ajahn Brahm (verbatim captions)

I remember one evening, the first few weeks, I was in this part of Thailand, going into the village in the evening, someone was getting married or something, we had to do some chanting. And as we were walking through this village, the houses were built on stilts. Underneath, was where they kept the water buffalo. And upstairs, was an open veranda. And house after house after house, I saw the same scene. There was one little lamp. It was an oil lamp. And they use an old toothpaste tube, which they cut off in half. And they stuck a rag, through the hole in the toothpaste tube. And that was the wick, and that's where they lit, sort of the wick, and the rag was just dipped in cheap kerosene. They couldn't even afford proper lanterns, but that worked fine. And by the light of that one little oil lamp, we saw the whole family sitting around in a semi-circle. And maybe the old grandma was telling ghost stories. Or, the old grandpa was telling fibs about when he went to Bangkok. You know, lies, tall stories, jokes. And the little children were there, the whole family from just you know, two or three years of age. to the old ancient grandma, talking to each other, as they were doing every evening, of their lives. When I saw that, house after house, I realised how much I've missed out.

## Teaching point

What we really want is love, togetherness and time with one another, not wealth.

## Reflection (in the spirit of Ajahn Brahm's talk)

Walking through a poor Thai village at night, the young monk saw family after family on their verandas round a toothpaste-tube lamp, grandparents telling tall tales to the little ones. He realised how much time his own family had spent on television and arguments. Tonight, switch something off and just talk; old stories improve with every telling.

## Source

- [What Do You Want? | Ajahn Brahm | 06-05-2011](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95XfzIJ-ov0) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 37:06 to 38:47: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95XfzIJ-ov0&t=2226s

Other tellings of this story:

- [A Talk About Nothing | Ajahn Brahm | 16 July 2021](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u40j_OlBL2U) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 20:19 to 22:45: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u40j_OlBL2U&t=1219s
- [How to Change The World | Ajahn Brahm | 13-07-2007](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9R6rUeUJZ5c) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 51:44 to 52:36: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9R6rUeUJZ5c&t=3104s
- [Simple Happiness and Contentment | Ajahn Brahm | 7 February 2025](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u7keCxXJf18) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 12:31 to 13:45: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u7keCxXJf18&t=751s
- [Freedom | Ajahn Brahm | 22 February 2019](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uuRrk9hnChU) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 6:37 to 9:27: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uuRrk9hnChU&t=397s