# I put my hand on his knee — we could always solve our differences

- Teacher: Ajahn Brahm
- Type: Story
- URL: https://beingmindfulstories.com/stories/brahm-thai-pm-hand-on-knee-friendship
- Themes: harmony, friendship, leadership
- Life situations: conflict at work, politics

## Synopsis (editorial summary)

As a young monk, Ajahn Brahm meets former Thai PM Dr Sanya Dharmasakti (later the King's chief adviser). The PM says he never met a problem with political enemies he couldn't solve one-on-one — hand on the knee as friendship first.

## The story, as told by Ajahn Brahm (verbatim captions)

we had a former Prime Minister of Thailand who came to visit at Incheon I had to speak with him for sure well those of you ties us that dr. Sonya Thomas Hauk he later became the King's chief adviser he was a prime minister for about one year in Thailand and he told me that he'd been in a support position he said there was never ever a problem I couldn't solve with my enemies with other politicians never was there a problem I couldn't solve and I just went to see them just the two of us he said I put my hand on his knee which in Thailand didn't mean you were gay it meant you were friends I put my hand on his knee as an act of friendship and because I'm a friendship the first part of our conversation we could always solve our differences and he meant that he was sincere and when a person is such an important and position weather is offered so much conflict is a prime minister a leader of a nation involved in other politicking and vested interest when he could say things like that I thought well why can I say things like that when I'm not a prime minister

## Teaching point

Friendship before negotiation dissolves differences that position cannot.

## Reflection (in the spirit of Ajahn Brahm's talk)

A former Thai prime minister told young Ajahn Brahm he'd never met a political enemy he couldn't reconcile with one to one. Friendship came first. The trick is seeing worth in others, in yourself, and in life. Life is precious, even its disappointments. If life feels worthless, please call a crisis line or someone you trust.

## Source

- [Harmony | Ajahn Brahm | 14-11-2008](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yFY_AY2dB9s) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 45:23 to 46:48: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yFY_AY2dB9s&t=2723s