# The grumpy licence

- Teacher: Ajahn Brahm
- Type: Story
- URL: https://beingmindfulstories.com/stories/brahm-grumpy-license
- Themes: depression, permission, humour, retreat
- Life situations: feeling pressured to be happy, retreat blues

## Synopsis (editorial summary)

On a meditation retreat a woman complains that everyone else is happy and she feels pressured to be happy. Brahm prints her a letterheaded 'grumpy licence' — permission to be grumpy for any reason or none for the rest of her life — signed Ajahn Brahm. She laughs; the grumpiness ends for a day or two.

## The story, as told by Ajahn Brahm (verbatim captions)

I wrote her out a grumpy license and it was on a letter head it was really nicely done nice font and I said this certificate gives you know to this girl permission to be grumpy for any reason or no reason whatsoever for the rest of her life s aab Bram her teacher it was a grumpy license and I've done many of those license before angry license depressed license I'll give you permission to be depressed and as soon as I gave her that grumpy license she looked at it and she laughed her head off and that was the end of her grumpiness

## Teaching point

Permission to feel bad often dissolves the stigma that was feeding it.

## Reflection (in the spirit of Ajahn Brahm's talk)

On retreat, a woman complained that everyone else's happiness pressured her. Ajahn Brahm printed her a signed licence to be grumpy for life. She laughed, and the grumpiness was gone for a day or two. Give yourself permission to feel low; stigma feeds it. If dark moods persist, talk to a doctor too.

## Source

- [Understanding suicide | Ajahn Brahm | 06-02-2015](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KqPCMJH5Emk) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 11:12 to 12:00: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KqPCMJH5Emk&t=672s

Other tellings of this story:

- [Guided Meditation | Ajahn Brahm | 22 April 2023](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PBuiPWfEMCE) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 9:39 to 11:38: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PBuiPWfEMCE&t=579s