# If she looks at you again, go for it

- Teacher: Ajahn Brahm
- Type: Story
- URL: https://beingmindfulstories.com/stories/brahm-father-girl-looks-at-you-twice
- Themes: fatherhood, dating, humour, youth
- Life situations: awkward teen questions, remembering a parent

## Synopsis (editorial summary)

At about fourteen he asked his father how to find a girlfriend. Dad said: if a girl looks at you once you don't know; if she looks at you again she likes you — go for it.

## The story, as told by Ajahn Brahm (verbatim captions)

asking for advice about how to find a girlfriend I remember the advice he said this is the sort of guy he was he said look if a girl looks at you once you don't know but if she looks at you again she likes you go for it and that's what my father told me when I was about 14

## Teaching point

A loving parent meets the child where their interest actually is.

## Reflection (in the spirit of Ajahn Brahm's talk)

At fourteen, Ajahn Brahm asked his father how to get a girlfriend. If she looks at you once, you can't tell; if she looks again, she likes you, so go for it. He loved his dad for meeting him where he was. Understand young people's pressures before scolding. Make home a place where they feel accepted.

## Source

- [Bringing Up Children | Ajahn Brahm | 09-12-2011](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ANrqHO24Ttw) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 51:01 to 51:26: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ANrqHO24Ttw&t=3061s