# “Suffering is asking from the world what it can never give you”

- Teacher: Ajahn Brahm
- Type: Story
- URL: https://beingmindfulstories.com/stories/brahm-executive-what-is-suffering
- Themes: suffering, expectations, Four Noble Truths
- Life situations: frustration with others, unrealistic expectations, busy professionals

## Synopsis (editorial summary)

A rushed executive in Malaysia or Singapore demands a quick answer: “Four Noble Truths, suffering — what is suffering? Come on, quickly.” Put on the spot, Ajahn Brahm rises to the occasion: “Suffering is asking from the world what it can never give you” — from your partner, your boss, your team, or yourself.

## The story, as told by Ajahn Brahm (verbatim captions)

again I think it was another of the Malaysia or Singapore one of these executives who was in a rush you know what people are like they're busy they can't spend all no even's you spending an hour listening to a talk is amazing most people want to get it quickly I often thought of getting like a driving Buddhist temple you know just go in there you order what talk you want and I give you advice anger depression or whatever and you go and go to the window and it's a few nice wise words thank you very much pay your money and leave I mean that would be a wonderful thing to have a driving Buddhist temple these days but so this person was doing that instead okay this this Buddhist teaching Four Noble Truths suffering what is suffering come on quickly and actually that there's sometimes I'd like it when people put me on the spot like that because when you put on the spot often you rise to the occasion and I was rose to the occasion I said what suffering is asking from the world what it can never give you I was actually credibly profound I was actually quite amazed at myself where do you get that word from but no investigator asking from the world but it can never give you and how much do you suffer because you continue to ask either from your partner from your boss at work you know from your 40 team or even worse from yourself asking from yourself what you will never be able to do that's called suffering

## Teaching point

Suffering comes from asking the world, others or ourselves for what they can never give — such as certainty.

## Reflection (in the spirit of Ajahn Brahm's talk)

Pressed by a hurried executive for a quick definition, Ajahn Brahm came up with one he still marvels at: suffering is asking the world for what it can never give. We ask partners, bosses and ourselves for perfection, and life for certainty. Notice the request you keep making that can't be met, and gently withdraw it.

## Source

- [Uncertainty | Ajahn Brahm | 15-07-2011](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pswsVGVdISY) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 7:17 to 8:57: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pswsVGVdISY&t=437s

Other tellings of this story:

- [Dealing with disasters | by Ajahn Brahm | 1 May 2015](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ex3qPBa83hQ) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 16:36 to 17:06: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ex3qPBa83hQ&t=996s