# Chicken or duck?

- Teacher: Ajahn Brahm
- Type: Joke
- URL: https://beingmindfulstories.com/stories/brahm-chicken-or-duck
- Themes: relationships, ego, being right, humour
- Life situations: marriage arguments, needing to be right, conflict

## Synopsis (editorial summary)

A newly married couple walking home from the temple hear 'quack quack'. She says, 'Darling, that's a chicken.' He says it's a duck — chickens go cock-a-doodle-doo. They argue back and forth ('d-u-c-k, duck') until she starts to cry. Remembering what he'd heard at the temple, he squeezes her hand: 'I apologise, darling, I think you're right, it is a chicken.' She squeezes back, 'Thank you', and they have a lovely evening.

## The story, as told by Ajahn Brahm (verbatim captions)

It's the great old story of the chicken and the duck. If you haven't heard this story before, this is a doozy, this is a great one. Once upon a time there was this couple who had just been married and after going to the temple for a nice talk, it was a beautiful evening so they went on a walk on the way back home. And as they were walking, they heard a sound quack quack quack and straightaway sort of the girl, the wife said: “darling do you hear that? That's a chicken.” I'm glad you laugh because those people who laugh haven't heard the story before, so at least some of you haven't heard the story. “That's a chicken,” and he said “darling that was not a chicken, that was a duck,” and she said “no no I'm sure it was a chicken.” It went quack quack again; “you see that's a chicken,” and he said “Darling, chickens go cockadoodledoo, that went quack quack that means it's a duck okay.” She said “No, I'm sure that was a chicken”. He said “It was a duck”. She said “No no it was a chicken”. He said “It was a duck, d.u.c.k duck”. And then she started to cry, “But, but he's a chicken”. They went quack quack again. Then he suddenly remembered what he'd heard at this temple many many times. He squeezed her hand and said “I apologize darling, I think you're right, it is a chicken”. And she squeezed his hand back and said “thank you”. And then they carried on their walk in peace and had a wonderful evening together.

## Teaching point

Being at peace and loving matters more than being right — and sometimes you're wrong anyway.

## Reflection (in the spirit of Ajahn Brahm's talk)

Newlyweds argued over whether a quacking bird was a chicken or a duck until she cried. Then he squeezed her hand: you're right, darling, it's a chicken. Was it worth spoiling the evening? Being loving matters more than being right. And who knows, it could have been a genetically modified chicken.

## Source

- [Why Is It So Hard To Be Kind? | Ajahn Brahm | 05 March 2010](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CbTLO-Z9rf8) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 6:39 to 8:53: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CbTLO-Z9rf8&t=399s

Other tellings of this story:

- [Real Life | Ajahn Brahm | 3 Jun 2016](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bzgG2HBzVDk) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 20:15 to 25:43: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bzgG2HBzVDk&t=1215s
- [Growing from Difficulties | Ajahn Brahm | 3 April 2020](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F0EQZ-nakfo) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 49:59 to 51:25: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F0EQZ-nakfo&t=2999s
- [The Right to Believe? | Ajahn Brahm | 18-05-2007](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1Prm3nAvFs) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 11:56 to 12:41: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1Prm3nAvFs&t=716s
- [New Year's Eve (Dhamma Talk, Meditation & Chanting) | Ajahn Brahm | 31 December 2020](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GpsBHggU_BY) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 12:22 to 15:38: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GpsBHggU_BY&t=742s