# 'I'm marrying your best friend tomorrow'

- Teacher: Ajahn Brahm
- Type: Story
- URL: https://beingmindfulstories.com/stories/brahm-celebrant-marrying-your-friend
- Themes: communication, humour, misunderstanding, right listening
- Life situations: misunderstandings, marriage

## Synopsis (editorial summary)

Dennis, the Buddhist Society's marriage celebrant, came home and told his wife, 'I'm marrying your friend Janice tomorrow.' 'You're married to me — you can't marry my best friend!' 'I'm doing her marriage ceremony. I'm the celebrant.'

## The story, as told by Ajahn Brahm (verbatim captions)

you know his former wife you know because he's a marriage cbrant you know he went home one day and he said oh I'm marrying your friend uh Janice tomorrow. And his wife said, "You're married to me. You can't be marrying my best friend." He said, "Look, I'm doing her marriage ceremony. I'm marrying your best friend tomorrow. I'm the marriage celebrant.

## Teaching point

Misheard words cause needless offence; practise 'right listening' and give the benefit of the doubt.

## Reflection (in the spirit of Ajahn Brahm's talk)

A marriage celebrant told his wife he was marrying her best friend tomorrow, and for a moment she was horrified. He was only conducting the ceremony. So much upset comes from hearing words instead of meaning. Practise right listening. Before reacting, check what someone actually meant.

## Source

- [Living Without Blame | Ajahn Brahm | 05-12-2014](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MR5c4h7Tmo0) (Buddhist Society of Western Australia) — watch from 22:28 to 22:56: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MR5c4h7Tmo0&t=1348s